


Restart my love

by YulianaHenderson



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M, I'm Bad At Summaries, Pregnant Sex, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-06
Updated: 2019-03-25
Packaged: 2019-10-23 11:25:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 24,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17682548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YulianaHenderson/pseuds/YulianaHenderson
Summary: Melinda May and Phil Coulson spend time together on Tahiti and they finally give in to their decade-long needs. When May ends up pregnant, she rightfully has fears. Luckily, Coulson will always love her, no matter what.





	1. First trimester

**Author's Note:**

> What's up, bitches! I'm back and with a brand-spanking-new piece of porn. Because that's what this is. Porn with love, but it's still just porn. It was initially meant as a companion piece to Mama May but it sort of had a life of it's own and I couldn't stop it from turning into this, whatever this is. So, be warned, the tags are correct: Melinda May is pregnant, but it doesn't stop them from getting freaky. *shrug* If that doesn't suit you, this is your fair warning. I won't even blame you for stopping.  
> Also, I know that May won't get pregnant anymore due to her age but can you blame a girl for dreaming?

Melinda May wondered right now how she had ever kept her hands off Phil Coulson. Then she remembered that she had thought about ripping his clothes off of him many times in the past at completely inappropriate times and realized that she might have had better self control than she was crediting herself for.

But now, all that self control was flushed down the drain, as the first thing they did when the Quinjet was out of sight was kiss each other senseless.

“I'm so happy you came with me,” he muttered when they parted to get air. She didn't grace that comment with a reply - she simply pulled him towards their cabin, pushing through multiple doors to ultimately push him onto his back on the bed.

His eyes showed her how appreciative he was of these actions, but she barely cared. She just needed to have him, inside of her, _now_.

Their clothes disappeared into thin air, and then they were naked on the bed looking at each other. There was something that was running through her mind that she needed to think of, but the more he smiled at her, the more that word flew out of reach.

She straddled his hips and his hands flew up to her hips to steady her, and she took him inside her in one fluent move. Her head fell back at the exquisite feeling of Phil Coulson’s cock inside her, and she didn’t take any prisoners, establishing a quick, rough pace, until both of them were panting and searching out release.

“Melinda,” he gasped, “I-” but she put her hand on his mouth. _Don’t say it yet, not when I’m fucking your brains out._ Maybe she would never be ready to hear those words from him.

She didn’t warn him when she came, but she guessed in the way his hands held onto her tighter, he already knew how close she was. He followed her in mere seconds, emptying inside of her, and that was when she realized what that one word was that she had tried so desperately to remember.

Condom.

_Fuck_.

Well, at least she was on the pill, and she was as clean as a whistle, so she truly hoped he was, too. She wanted to find energy to hate herself for rushing like this, but as the afterglow of her orgasm washed over her, she simply sank down onto his chest, his cock still inside her, and his arms wrapping tightly around her.

Her last days with Phil Coulson would surely be interesting.

 

~...~

 

She felt like throwing up.

She was _pregnant_.

He had tried to convince her that he would stay, but aside from the fact that she had little trust in anyone or anything at the moment, she also knew he was still dying. She wasn’t even certain if he would make it till the end of the week, so how dare he say that he would stick by her side?

She wondered how this had happened. Sure, they had skipped on the condoms on Tahiti, considering both were clean and she was on the pill. She knew the pill didn’t always have a 100% success rate, but she wasn’t 18 anymore and she had thought that she wasn’t that fertile to begin with. She had tried with Andrew a million times to get pregnant, without luck.

But when she got her trusted strip of pills out of her bag, she realized with shame and anger that she had skipped not just one, but multiple pills, right in the period where she and Phil had unprotected sex.

How could she be so stupid? How had she let herself get carried away like this? She was always so disciplined when it came to her pill, but then she remembered his strong arms around her, and her need to just be with him, not even toilet breaks were acceptable.

Perhaps she could manage. But she knew she could never be a good mother.

 

~...~

 

They didn’t ignore each other anymore, which was a good thing. She wasn’t shutting him out, which was another. But for some reason, even though that was the exact reason they were in this mess, sex just seemed out of the question for a while. Perhaps her subconscious knew that it couldn’t possibly be just sex anymore, which is what she had held onto in Tahiti, the idea that this could never really be about more than just them fucking in whatever way possible. The concept of love was so out of reach and at the same time, she wanted to get even further away from it.

Didn’t mean that eventually, they didn’t have needs. Which is why she had disregarded his wishes to be alone for the night and had sneaked into his bedroom, just to feel him, and then she would leave. She needed him. Even though her belly was starting to show exactly why they were too dangerous together, and she just hoped he could look past that.

It seemed almost a cruel joke, that the first time they had sex after finding out she was pregnant, the first intelligible word before getting naked was exactly _that_ word.

“Condom?” he asked her, his hands on her ass distracting her. She pushed him away out of reflex.

“Are you kidding me?”

“What?”

“I’m already pregnant, what are you trying to protect me from?”

Regret and shame filled his eyes, and he looked down. She knew it was mostly her fault, that’s what you get from not taking your pills, Melinda May - but she knew, it took two to tango, and he also had not suggested using a condom. They were both equally guilty, and it showed in his face.

“Look, I’m sorry,” he whispered, his hands by his side clenching into fists. “I wish I could turn back time. But… I love you. And I want to be with you.”

“Well, you’ll hardly have a choice,” she spat, not sure whether she was angry or scared. Probably both.

“Good.”

She looked at him, his eyes void of shame now, just full of love and longing. Her heart skipped a beat.

“Can we just forget for a moment that I’m pregnant? I need you so much.”

He didn’t let that be stated twice, and pulled her flush against his body, one hand on her ass again and the other in the back of her neck.

She was quickly losing patience, like she always did with him. She couldn’t wait a minute longer, needed to feel his cock inside her, his kisses peppering all the skin he could reach.

She really did love him, and she knew that. He loved her, too, that was also an indisputable fact. But she was scared of commitment, was scared of permanence, and therefore, she knew he would walk away eventually, because she was too much to handle and altogether the least fun to be in a relationship with. She wondered how Andrew had held out for that long.

Phil was getting less passive, and it showed in the fact that he was not afraid to switch positions, pin her underneath him so he could pound into her just the way they both liked. His thrusts got harder and faster, and all she could do was simply hold onto the sheets beside her and ride out her pleasure with him.

He paused, just as she was so close to the precipice, and she whimpered and looked at him - she was nearly floored by the expression on his face, loving, gentle, like he was just so absolutely in love with her he needed to pause to give his feelings some space.

“Phil,” she breathed, grabbing his ass with her hands, trying to spur him on. “Dammit!”

He started to thrust into her again, slow, gentle movements, and she would bash his head in afterwards, but then he pushed himself up straight, so he was kneeling in between her legs, and she frowned at him.

“I’ll kill you if you don’t move right now.”

Her threats didn’t faze him. She tried all the tricks in the book to get him to move faster, clenching her inner muscles, reaching for him to spur him on, but he was too far away for her to reach while she was still on her back, and he didn’t seem to want to accept those actions, anyway.

“Phil?”

“I love you,” he whispered, his hands tracing lines on her bare skin, starting with her knees which were clamped tightly against his sides. His small thrusts only added to the sensation, and while she hated how slow he went, she couldn’t deny that this… was really working for her.

It was love. This was not just sex, this was not her throwing him on the bed and riding him, hard - this was that scary word that she had always wanted to associate with him, but couldn’t do it anymore now that it was finally possible.

She was pregnant and he would die and that was the painful truth.

She wanted to push him off, her emotions getting the better of her, but he didn’t let her. Instead, his fingers traced a path up her thighs, resting for a moment at the place where they were joined, the tips of his fingers tracing a couple circles on her clit. She couldn’t help the moan that escaped her, even though she knew it was only adding to this moment.

His fingers now rested on her hips, and he tore his eyes away from her body for a moment, to look her in the eye.

“Do you trust me, Melinda?”

She shouldn’t, she really shouldn’t - he had been so unfair, he had disregarded her wishes for him to take the serum, he had wasted their chances at a future together, but still… she trusted him. More than anybody she knew, she trusted him - he was her best friend, her partner, the love of her… life. He was the _love of her life_.

She swallowed down tears that were starting to build. It wasn’t too early to blame this on the pregnancy hormones, was it?

“Of course.”

His hands then covered her belly, that slight bump that indicated that the baby was still growing - they would undoubtedly love her, like children always loved their parents, even though she was ashamed to admit that she had wished them gone in the dark hours of some nights. This baby was the reason Phil and her needed to work together, needed to stick beside each other, no matter how painful it was that he was dying, no matter how painful it was that she knew she had to do all of this parent stuff alone.

She wasn’t even sure if he would make it to see her belly grow. But he had noticed, and he was still here, and his eyes told her of everything they could have had, the future they could have had together, if only he had listened to her and taken that god damn serum!

She was crying now, love and pleasure and a tinge of heartache overwhelming her, as he was cherishing her belly, the growing of new life right there, while his cock was still pumping inside of her at an agonizingly slow pace.

“Oh god,” she cried, one arm coming up to cover her face. If she was breaking down, especially during sex, the least she could do was keep him from seeing it. But she felt him move down again, and then his gentle hand was pushing away hers, for it to be replaced by his soft lips. He picked up his pace and she wrapped her arms around him, her legs doing the same, and he whispered his love into the crook of her neck, while she damn near prayed to a god she didn’t believe in to please let him live, please let him meet this baby, “please don’t leave me.”

He shook his head and she realized she must have said that last part aloud, but when she wanted to take back those words, he thrust into her even harder, and suddenly she was overwhelmed with pleasure, and her orgasm tackled her faster than it ever had, making her see stars, her heart reaching out for his, god damnit, did she really have to miss this love? Was the universe really this cruel?

Her orgasm only spurred him on, and he bent his back just so he could take a nipple in his mouth, and it sent a wave of pure pleasure right to her core, and she gasped, her breasts had never been this sensitive, not even with him.

“Phil!”

“I’ve got you,” he whispered, and he came back up to kiss her. “I promise.”

She had never felt like this, ever, in her decades worth of experience, she had never felt so truly satisfied, loved, complete as she did in this moment, and he only added to her feelings and he didn’t even need to do much.

Well, he didn’t _need_ to do much, but he still lowered his hand until he could gently rub her clit, and damn him, she saw stars again, her next orgasm tackling her from behind, and he still kept rubbing her through it, until she heard him groan and spill himself inside of her. He didn’t stop kissing her.

Damn.

_Damn._

She had never experienced sex like this. Most men were afraid of taking the lead with her, in fear of her snapping their neck, but Phil knew her inside and out (quite literally) and knew what she needed. She needed someone to see through her shit, see her for who she really was - on the outside, a statue, hiding her feelings so nothing and nobody could hurt her, but on the inside, craving love and attention and someone to prove to her that they loved her, despite how much of a bitch she could be. She loved it when he took control, showed her how much he could pleasure her.

But she knew, no matter how many times she would deny it, this wasn’t just sex - this was love, this was them showing their love to each other, their trust in one another, admiration, hope for the future…

Her arms wrapped around him tighter, and he rolled them on their sides, still inside her semi-erect. His hand caressed her naked body, as slick with sweat as his, and her heart warmed, as his lips settled against her temple.

“That was…” She didn’t have any words for it, honestly. This was lovemaking and that was a completely new word in her vocabulary, so any and all terms to describe how whole she felt just didn’t exist yet.

He smiled against her skin, and it brought out a smile in her, too. They were silent for a long time, catching their breaths.

“I know you want to ignore this,” he whispered, one of his hands slipping down to rest on her lower belly, “but I can’t. You’re pregnant with our baby and… and I love you even more for it.”

“You’ll die, Phil.”

“I know. But I want to cherish us for as long as I possibly can. I don’t want to stay away from you. I don’t want to ignore this subject. I love you so much, Melinda. We’ve been apart for too long already. Can’t we be together now? I’ve spent enough years apart.”

“I don’t want to hurt, Phil… it hurts so much.”

His hand came up to brush her hair, also wet with sweat, and he ran his hand through it, like he was comforting a sad child. Her heart lurched at that idea - he would not be too bad a father, but that prospect was heavily clouded with not knowing if he would even get there.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I’m so sorry.”

“Sorry doesn’t quite cut it.”

“I know. But I’m still sorry. That still stands, no matter what happens.”

“And what happens next, Phil? My belly grows while I wonder every single day if you’ll still be around to see it?”

His lips pressed against her forehead, and she shut up effectively, while his arms pulled her just that little bit closer.

“Let’s not argue,” he whispered. He was right, of course. There was no way they could change the past, not even the future, and fighting didn’t make her feel any better.

His hands definitely did, as one lowered to her clit again, and his cock twitched inside her. She wouldn’t fight him anymore. But she couldn’t keep herself from thinking the worst.


	2. Second trimester

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the kind words and I hope you enjoy this second chapter! A lot longer than the previous one, I know. Also, I don't actually focus on saving Coulson because I've done that before and I wanted to focus on the stuff around it more. So, he's saved. But don't ask me how!

She had saved him. She was still unsure how, the moments fading away as she rested her tired eyes on his frame.

He looked healthy, more than he had done over the past… years. Like his body was ready to live again, just like his soul had been ready all along.

She couldn’t help herself from seeking comfort in his arms, these long months of living in fear that he would die slowly crumbling in her head to make room for-  _ him _ . She could finally focus on a future with him, something she had looked forward to all these years, something she had thought was so far out of her reach but he had stepped closer to her and made it happen. 

“Fuck,” she whispered, and he hadn’t even done anything besides kissing her, but she was so incredibly grateful that he was alive, that he was there, and that he was willing to spend his life with her, despite how difficult she could be. She pushed him onto the nearest chair or couch, whatever, and climbed into his lap, her hands in the back of his neck keeping him in place for her kisses. Not that she needed to keep him in place for anything - he went willingly.

They hadn’t had sex nearly as much as she would have liked, but what with the missions he still went on and her growing belly that was quickly making her feel awkward and uncomfortable, she had not had any appetite for it except an occasional blowjob, which she guessed could be enough for him. (She knew, him going down on her was way out of the question, because it brought too many risks for the baby. Which served to diminish her appetite for sex even more, because the only way she would get him now was by actual intercourse, and as the months progressed, her body hurt more and more with the idea.)

But this time, it was different. She still felt uneasy, her massive belly and disappearing waistline making her feel anything but sexy, but she did need him, and she hoped he could see past her swollen physique - perhaps he could take her from behind, that way, he didn’t have to see much of her belly.

“Are you sure you want this?” he asked her, knowing and understanding of her reluctance to engage in any sexual actions, and not wanting to push her further than she wanted to go. She simply ripped open his shirt, sending buttons flying, and that was enough answer for him. His hand cupped her ass, like the rest of her body swollen beyond belief, but maybe that was the best place to swell, aside from her- 

He buried his face between her breasts, and she felt the warmth of his breath through the fabric of her shirt. Off, it needed to go off, and as though he had read her mind, his fingers hooked around the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head. She was left in her not so sexy maternity bra (which would also double as a nursing bra in the future, but the thought scared her a little to think about it for too long), but his eyes focused on her breasts and she saw nothing but lust and passion in those clear blue orbs. 

She pushed off his lap and started to work on her black sweats, and she saw he tried to push his own pants off, but not managing he instead focused on her undressing.

“Don’t look,” she stated, wiggling out of her sweats in an ungraceful manner, and realized that he did often help her get undressed in this stage of her pregnancy, in a non-sexual way. When she was standing there in just her underwear, she looked at him again, and he was staring. She quickly felt uncomfortable under his gaze, and stepped closer to kiss him and get his mind off staring at her.

“Why can’t I look?”

“Because I’m fat and anything but sexy.”

She kissed him again, and his hands came up to rest on her hips, his fingers toying with the waistline of her panties. She nearly climbed into his lap again before she realized she wasn’t naked yet, and needed to be naked before they could take this further. She wasn’t as mobile as she wanted to be.

“Are you kidding me?” he asked her as she stepped away.

“Yeah, I need to be naked.” She reached for the hook of her bra and that was when he jumped up, stepping right in front of her and undoing it himself. He threw the garment to the side, not caring where it landed.

“You really think you’re not sexy?”

“Well, duh, look at me.”

He raised an eyebrow and looked down at her, and she felt the need to cover up again, regretting getting rid of her bra. Dammit, this wasn’t their first time, far from it, but it had been so long and he hadn’t seen her naked body this pregnant before. 

“I’m looking right now.” She rolled her eyes but she wasn’t convinced, until he took her hand and put it right on his cock - his cock, which was unbelievably hard already, and they had hardly touched at all. “Melinda, you’re unbelievably sexy. Especially now.”

He leaned down and kissed her, and she moaned, damn he felt so good, and he thought she was sexy? How was that possible? She was basically a whale and she was only in her second trimester.

She guessed he could sense that she needed a little more convincing, as though his hard cock wasn’t enough proof. His hands hovered over her breasts, but just before he touched them, he went for her hips instead, knowing how sensitive her breasts were these days.

“You have gone up a cup or two,” he whispered in her ear, “and it kills me that they look so touchable but I can’t. Touch. Them. And you feel so good now, on the inside, you already did but even more now that you’re pregnant. I don’t know how to explain it… you just do. And your belly makes me feel things… that’s my baby in there. You’re carrying my child. I can’t think of anything sexier than that.”

And she attacked his lips, not even slowing down when he gasped against hers and wrapped his arms tightly around her, for as much as that was possible with her belly in the way. Normally, she would be able to feel his erection against her hip by now, but this belly kept her from that pleasure, so instead, she cupped him again through his boxers, eliciting another gasp from him.

They quickly picked up where they had left off minutes ago before she had started to get them naked, and she pushed him back in the chair, but that was when he reached out an arm and kept her from slipping into his lap.

“Wait.”

She groaned and tried to push back into his arms.

“Before I ravish you here on the floor, you need to be comfortable.”

He got up from the chair and took her hand to lead her to their bed - it was still technically his, but she had sneaked into his room in the middle of the night so often that eventually, she just settled for sleeping there most of the time. She couldn’t be helped - with how uncomfortable she could be during the night, his hands were about the best support she could get.

“Just fuck me already,” she proclaimed, but he wouldn’t listen to her - instead, he helped her lie down on her side and used some pillows to support her belly, and then, it was lonely for a while, and her belly didn’t allow her to lean up and look at what he was doing. Then, when she was about to get up altogether, she felt him settling down behind her, one arm wrapping around her to pull her flush against him, and his hard cock pressed against her ass made her shiver with anticipation.

“Are you alright? Not too cold?”

“If you don’t shove that cock inside me right now, I swear I will-”

Of course, he shut her up by doing exactly what she had asked him, and it sent a wave of pleasure all throughout her body. She let out a gasp and searched for his hands, his arms, anything of him to hold onto. He angled both their hips so he could penetrate her deeper, and damn, she had felt amazing sex with him before, but every single time he just seemed to show her that there was still room for improvement. 

“Melinda,” he breathed into her ear, and she shivered again, loved to hear what their lovemaking was doing to him, how he was losing his mind, how turned on he was. Even now, in her swollen, pregnant state, he still wanted to have sex with her, still thought she was sexy, and it simply blew her mind. How could he love her so much, that he was willing to accept every part of her, body and soul, to accept her even when she was fat and grumpy and a bitch, to still deem her worthy of his love? 

“You feel so good.”

“Phil, please… harder…”

She knew this position didn’t allow for rough sex, and maybe that was the point, because she knew he wouldn’t want to hurt her, and she guessed he was afraid that she would refuse to have sex with him for a while again if he went too fast and hard too soon. But laying here, his warm, firm body pressed against her back, his strong arms wrapped around her and his hard, exquisite cock deep inside her, she wondered how she had gone for so long without having him.

She wouldn’t refuse him, ever again. 

His hand ran down her sides to her top knee, and pulled a little, to spread her legs, and when he pulled out almost entirely only to thrust back in, she saw stars behind her closed eyelids, and while in the past, even with him, she wanted to take control… now, all she wanted was for him to bring her to release, take her hard, show her how much he loved her.

“Phil, I-" She almost said it, she really did, but just as she started to think about the mere fact that she had, his fingers on her clit pushed her over the edge, and she was damn sure she had passed out, because when she refocused, she heard his calm voice call to her.

“Melinda?”

“Don't stop,” she gasped, returning to her senses again when his cock twitched inside her.

She was way more sensitive during her pregnancy, and he took full advantage of that, much to her pleasure - he could easily send her over the edge three times before he even came close, but he knew when to show her mercy and he knew this was one of these moments. His fingers worked on her clit a little faster than before, and it bordered on painful with how sensitive she was, but it turned out to be his kisses in her neck that made her climax again, pulling him with her. 

They held onto each other for far longer than was strictly necessary, but she still often forgot that she didn't have to steal moments with him anymore - he was hers, like she was his, and everybody knew they were together and nobody judged them. Still, it felt almost too natural to be hiding, to be keeping them a secret. 

But she would get to spend the entire night with him, if they both wanted to. She didn't need to be anywhere in the morning.

He was still panting in her ear and it made her smile - to think she had been the cause of his exertion, even if she had only lain there and received his love, it warmed her heart in a way it totally shouldn't. 

“I can't believe,” he breathed, “you think you're not sexy.”

“You're still on about that?”

“Well, yes. We both look at you,” another pause to catch his breath, “in a completely different way.”

“I guess so.”

“Hmm.”

Maybe before her pregnancy, she could have agreed she was possibly sexy. She had worked hard to get the body she had once had, but she knew, she might never get that body back. So really, Phil definitely needed to accept her like she was, what she was soon becoming - a mom. And May knew, moms, really, were anything but sexy. 

“You still out of breath?”

He smiled against the skin in her neck. “I’m an old man, Melinda.” 

“And somehow you still give off the vibe of being twelve.”

He chuckled and stroked his hands down her arms.

He nuzzled her hair with the tip of his nose, and she sighed in bliss, completely content with falling asleep right here, with his arms around her and his cock still inside her. But of course, he had to do exactly what she didn't want him to do.

He pulled out and placed his hand on her pussy, gently rubbing but not to arouse her, she knew. He had this annoying habit of extremely good aftercare, for a lack of a better word. He always checked up on her, even though he had been mostly gentle with her, but she was pregnant and he saw it as a necessity to make sure she was okay. 

It was sweet. Although quite annoying sometimes. But it confirmed the feeling that he would never hurt her, and it made her feel even safer with him than she already had been.

“Are you still sensitive?”

She nodded, her hand quickly covering his, hoping he might want to go for a second round. She wouldn't deny she was still dripping wet. (Although most of it was his seed.)

“I haven't been paying enough attention to you,” he said quietly, his hand moving away underneath hers, but she wouldn't let him. “I've been wanting you so much every single day…”

“It's my fault. I pushed you away.”

“Sure. But I shouldn't allow you to pull that shit. I know you better than that.”

“Hmm."

He got up after a while, leaving a kiss on her shoulder, and she wanted to protest it, but she was too immobile and tired to keep him from leaving.

She settled against the pillow and sighed almost wistfully, never knowing she could be pining for her man so much, and perhaps it were the hormones, but she really wanted him to be here again. She felt the baby kick, and it startled her a little, like it often did. She put her hand on her belly and really couldn't stop the smile from forming on her lips. 

Man, she was so scared. She wasn't cut out for this, she was afraid she would mess up an innocent soul, but she hoped Phil would help with that. She was fucked up beyond belief, but he was everything that was pure in this world, sweet and kind and compassionate. Even when he was fucking her lights out, he still wanted her to be comfortable and warm and he wanted her to feel good.

“Alright, do you want to sleep or take a bath?”

“What?”

“Although I do want to warn, if you go for option two, I can't promise to keep my hands off you.”

She smiled faintly, hearing the longing in his voice. How could she possibly choose to sleep now, knowing that her man was offering to draw her a hot bath and possibly fuck her just the way she wanted him to? 

“I figure that'll be option two?”

She smiled at him fully now, as he stepped in her view, and her heart skipped a beat when she saw his erection mighty and proud between his legs, like he hadn’t just come and he wasn’t in his fifties. She briefly wondered what it was that he had been doing in those minutes of absence but wouldn’t blame him if he had tended to himself for a few moments. He didn’t leave enough room for her to check up on him, every time she wanted to care for him, he would bring her attention elsewhere and before they knew it, she would be high up on a cloud again.

“God, I love you,” he breathed, reaching out his hands and pulling her up gently. She couldn't help but kiss him as he guided her to the bathroom.

 

~...~

 

He wouldn't allow her to touch him, even though she felt his obvious arousal against her back. Instead, he was spreading soap suds all over her naked body, kissing her neck, and god dammit, he was so good with his hands. She was such a sucker for him, and she couldn’t believe that she hadn't wanted to be with him for so long. She was certain she would have him until dawn, or until she passed out, whichever came first.

Well. That was, if he would do anything other than washing her.

“I can't wait for the baby to be here,” he admitted, his hands around her sensitive breasts completely countering the innocence in his comment. 

She was scared, but she wouldn't say that out loud too often. She knew that he was aware of her fears, but since he knew her so well… he wouldn't really bring it up until she did.

“What are you scared of?” he asked her suddenly. Well, she guessed she had underestimated him.

“It's not that I'm scared, I just… okay maybe I'm scared. I don't know what to expect, I don't know if I can do it… I'm just not mom material.”

“Nonsense. Of course you are.”

“You're just saying that so you can get inside my panties.”

“You're not wrong, but you know I don't need to say anything to do that.”

She felt his smile against her neck, his chest shaking a little as he laughed. Thankfully, it added some friction to his crotch and she shifted in his arms, and she felt his cock spring to life against her back.

“Melinda, you're perfect mom material. You're patient and thoughtful and smart. I can't think of anybody better skilled to be a mother to our child.”

“Okay, now you're just exaggerating.”

“It's nothing but the truth, Melinda. I hope in time, you’ll see that, too.”

She rolled her eyes and shook her head, wanting to counter his words once more, but then his hand slid down her stomach under the water, brushed over her clit and skipped right to her pussy, slipping one finger inside, and she arched her back against him, her head on his shoulder. She felt him smile against the side of her head when he kissed her temple, and dammit, he really didn’t need to do much to turn her on.

His thumb rested against her clit, applying just enough pressure to add to the pleasure his fingers were giving her when he added another finger. She would have expected him to maybe rush her into orgasm so he could get inside her properly, if his erection against her back was any indication, yet he took his sweet time, both increasing and decreasing the pressure and speed until she was simply jelly in his arms, tears in the corners of her eyes. 

“Please, Phil…” she whimpered, one hand holding onto his wrist to try and get him to speed up, finish her off, she would die if he kept going like this. He seemed to give in, because he pulled back his fingers and they resurfaced, his other hand on her hips to steady her. “No, wait.”

His hands reared back, and she guessed he was afraid he had ruined something now, but she just reached for his hands and held them, using them as leverage to turn around in his arms so she was straddling his hips, and as she leaned forward, she kissed his lips. She had trouble reaching him, her belly in the way, but this was better than the alternative.

“I want to look at you,” she whispered, and the corners of his lips turned upwards, and both his hands came up again, one resting in the back of her neck, the other on her hips to try and steady her. She reached between them to grab hold of his cock, and he groaned under her touch, and she teased him a little like he had teased her before, but when his fingers curled almost painfully around her hip, she gave up the act. She wanted him as much as he wanted her, so there was no use in delaying the inevitable. 

When she sank down, they both groaned, putting their foreheads together and just breathing for a few moments, giving her time to accommodate him. She took him in all the way, until it almost hurt, but she couldn’t let go of him anymore, couldn’t let him leave. 

“Melinda,” he breathed, his lust and longing visible in his voice, and she grabbed both of his hands to put them on her hips. 

“You have to help me a little,” she said quietly, only a little embarrassed to not have the same flexibility that she used to have, but she knew nobody would blame her with this massive belly keeping her from moving around properly. He smiled at her and supported her hips, his legs coming up behind her so she could use them to rest against. Pushing up and down his length once, she realized she also had more leverage like that, and secretly thanked him for his thoughtfulness. 

“God,” he panted, and as she looked down at herself for a moment, she was aware she was on full display to him, naked and slightly red and very pregnant, and she felt his cock twitch inside her. “God, I love you.”

No matter how many times he would say those words, she would never get used to them, how it filled all the empty parts inside her heart, how it warmed her bones, made her want to sacrifice anything, even herself, just to let him live.

She loved him so much. And she realized, not for the first time, that she would get to spend the rest of her life with him, she could have him like this in her arms every single day if she wanted to, she would have a child with him soon - he would be with her. He would be by her side, and she couldn’t thank the universe enough for finally giving her what she had always wanted. 

His fingers touched her cheek and she startled, realizing she had been zoning out a little. He simply smiled at her and put his hand in the back of her neck. 

“Are you alright?”

She hadn't realized that she was crying, and it was apparent when he brushed a tear off her cheek.

“Since when did I get so vanilla?” she deadpanned. He chuckled and it sent some tremors to her core as his cock shook slightly inside her. Damn, why did that feel so good?

“Since this isn't sex. This is making love.”

She was too emotional and honestly too aroused to give an intelligent response, but she guessed her expression still revealed her slight annoyance at his cheesiness. 

“No, I'm for real.” He grabbed one of her hands and placed a kiss on her wrist, and she was certain he could feel her erratic heartbeat there. “I realized this recently… at least for me, it's always mostly been about my pleasure… without even being aware of it, it really was mostly about me in my head. But… it's all about giving and taking, mostly giving… and if it feels right… I want to give more than I take. Apparently. With you… I don't even want anything. Just giving you pleasure, kissing you and making you feel good, seeing you cum… it's all I'll ever need.”

“Phil…”

He could tell she was close, she knew that - he had this way of getting her closer to orgasm with just words, an occasional thrust of his hips, and just the mere fact that he was here, naked and in love with her. 

“Tell me what you need,” he whispered, leaning up a little so they could kiss, and she kept him there with just a hand in the back of his neck, extending their kiss, and she was still just putty in his arms, no matter which angle you looked at it from.

And she realized… she didn’t need anything. Not anymore. Everything she could ever need was right here, him smiling at her, their unborn baby safely tucked away between them. She could do nothing more than just wrapping her arms around him, pulling him as tight to her as he possibly could be, knowing full well that their current position couldn’t really result in any movements in their nether regions, but she knew… she was okay with it. 

She had always been a big fan of quick, rough sex, against a wall or in the shower or a quickie from behind, but she realized it had always been just that - sex. She had never had this before, this thing she had with Phil, she had never been taken care of so well, had never had the desire to just be held or kissed. He had changed her life in so many ways. (And sure, quickies were still nice, and with her changing libido sometimes that was the only option, but she loved their  _ lovemaking sessions _ now, where she could take her time to enjoy him and have him lick every inch of her body. Had she mentioned how good he was with his mouth?)

“I love you,” she whispered against his lips, knowing full well she didn’t throw around that sentence often, and she had only said it a handful of times to him, probably even less. He deserved to hear it much more often, and that was her vow to him, if ever she’d had one. 

“I love you,” he replied, his fingers brushing through her damp hair, keeping her close to him - not that she was going anywhere.

He smiled and kissed her again, and it was much later that they finally said something again, still not really moving from their position, although she had leaned mostly against his chest by then to keep the pressure off his back. She was surprised to find her eyelids get a bit heavy, but it was probably due to the warmth his body was radiating and the still slightly warm water of the bathtub that she was getting sleepy. 

“Hey,” he whispered gently, getting her attention. “You want to go to bed?”

She pushed off his chest only slightly to look up at him. His cock was still hard inside her, and it almost seemed like both had forgotten at that point. “Don’t you want to finish?”

He chuckled slightly. “Didn’t look like we were finishing anything.”

She had to smile at that, and thought of her options, but his arms were just so comfortable, this position was just too nice, she was so warm and satisfied. 

“Do  _ you _ want to finish this?”

“Hmm,” she replied, and she guessed she was probably half asleep already. “Maybe in bed.”

He nodded and brushed her hair a little longer, before he was the wiser one and made the first starts to get out of the tub. When he pulled out of her, it felt almost painful, to lose him like that, even though she knew she could get him again if she only asked. He was the first to get out of the tub and helped her emerge, too, wrapping her up in a big towel and pushing her off towards their bed. She was glad that SHIELD had invested in proper accommodations, because she wanted nothing more than just dive into bed with the man of her dreams and sleep and possibly make love all night long. She had always liked ensuites. 

He wasn’t following her, though, in his gloriously naked form, still hard, doing anything but moving to the bed, and she nearly reached out to grab his hand, but his eyes made it clear that he would be there shortly, so she dried off properly before climbing into bed. She even covered herself with the sheets, telling herself not to fall asleep but not being very surprised when she found it hard to stay awake.

That was, until he came into view with that small, permanent smile on his lips, and she was wide awake.

“I got us some water. You need to drink after that bath.”

He sat on the edge of the bed first, handing her a bottle of water, and she stared at him first before taking a sip, leaning up a little. 

Eventually, he slipped in under the covers too, and she could see, just before the sheets covered him, that he was now semi hard - damnit, this was him being sweet, and the only thing she could look at was his cock?

“If you want to continue what we started,” he started, his arms reaching out to hold her for whatever they were going to do next, whether it be another amazing round of  _ lovemaking _ (still sounded just a little weird to think of such a meaningful word) or just sleep the night away, “you just say the word.”

“Which word?”

He rolled his eyes and looked at her, a bright smile on his face, but she wasn’t sure she knew what he was smiling about. She pulled him close with a hand in the back of his neck, and he took the hint quickly, kissing her deeply and at the same time rolling on top of her, keeping his weight on his elbows. She felt how he quickly nudged a pillow underneath her lower back.

“I want you, but I’m tired,” she whispered honestly, but not stopping in any way, kissing him again when his lips came close enough. He nodded and left her lips to kiss a trail down to that sensitive spot just behind her ear.

“That’s okay,” he reassured her. “You just lay back, I’ll do all the work.”

“You always do all the work.”

“Maybe. But you’re working hard enough as it is.”

“I’m unemployed,” she deadpanned.

One of his hands came up to rest on her belly, while his mouth definitely sucked a hickey into her skin. She gasped as it shot a flash of pleasure to her core, reigniting the fire. 

“You’re growing our baby. It’s hard work.”

He wasn’t wrong, but she still wanted to counter him - after all, he was usually the one bringing her to multiple orgasms before finally giving in to his own without much help from her; he was the one who did most of the janitorial work around their living space; he was the one usually cooking for the two of them.

But then she realized, the reason he did all these things - she was often too far gone in her pleasure to even be aware of where she was; their baby was not just swelling her belly, but everything was swollen and she hurt all over on a good day; and he was a far better cook than her, the fact confirmed by basically everybody they knew. 

He didn’t test her wetness before he slid his cock inside in one movement, perhaps knowing her too well, knowing in moments like this, despite being sleepy, she wasn’t easily turned off. (And he knew she still liked rough and tested the limits from time to time. As long as it was safe.) His first thrust always sent pleasure to every crevice in her body, and her head fell back, arching up against him. 

“God,” she heard him grunt, knowing he could rarely keep in these sounds when they had sex, knowing he was anything but quiet, and she loved it. He gave her some slow, shallow thrusts, perhaps trying to warm her up a little, but any more turned on and she would probably die. 

“I’m close,” she whispered, looking at him when she was used to his size, one arm around his neck and the other reaching beside her to grab hold of the sheets. “Don’t delay.”

He smiled and her heart skipped a beat, and then he was picking up his pace, his face always close to hers to kiss and tease her and smile against her cheek, and it wasn’t long until she saw stars and she was holding onto him tightly as she came, pulling him with her over the edge, spilling inside her. He almost immediately fell to the side, her arms around him pulling her onto her side, too, whispering his love for her against the skin in her neck.

As she snuggled into him, his arms tightly around her, a pillow once again magically appearing underneath her belly, she quickly felt sleep surround her, despite her best efforts not to give in - she wanted to cherish him, she didn’t get enough time with him and that was mostly her own fault, but now she was willing and ready to go. But soon, her exhaustion was simply too big to remain awake, and she closed her eyes with a satisfied smile on her lips.

“I’ve got you,” he whispered, brushing her hair out of her face. “I won’t leave. I love you.”

Her world was right with him in it. He was showing her what it was like to be truly loved, to love, without the need for rough sex and multiple orgasms, although that was fun, too.

She was perfectly satisfied with being in his arms, touch every bit of naked skin she could reach, kiss him until she was breathless, and hear him whisper all kinds of loving words into her ear. 

But sleep overtook her eventually before she managed to explore this new side to their love, the most important words still lingering on her lips.

“I love you.”

It had never been truer than it was in that moment.


	3. Third trimester

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry y'all, it took me longer than I intended to publish this chapter. Was meaning to publish it with Valentine's Day! But here we are. Please enjoy!

He wasn’t ashamed to admit that most of his dreams revolved around her. Sure, it might seem needy or weak, but she was most of his life at that point, and his thoughts were rarely not with her, so it seemed fitting for his dreams to match that sentiment, too.

And it were good dreams. Of her, in just her satin bathrobe, pregnant belly trying to escape from between the fabric. Her cheeks were flushed that gorgeous pink, like they often were when she just got out of the shower (or when she was really turned on). Her hair was damp around her shoulders, and when she moved around his tiny ensuite bathroom, the satin of her bathrobe flew around her like, like-

He had always been bad with words, but she was the most beautiful human being he had ever had the pleasure of knowing, much less loving. He was so in love with her, her body, her mind, her soul, and she showed him that she reciprocated those feelings, wholeheartedly. Maybe her feelings didn’t run as deeply as his, he was so much more of a pussy than she was, but with every sigh and kiss and smile that she sent his way, he knew she loved him very much.

When the first signs of consciousness presented itself, images of that one hot night weeks ago flashed into his head, one of his favorite memories. The memory of her in his arms in the bathtub, naked, her skin rosy and her eyes looking into his as though they were trying to connect with his very soul - he groaned softly as pleasure overtook him before he even managed to open his eyes and rid them of sleep.

But then he realized that it wasn’t just his indecent dreams that were giving him pleasure and causing his morning wood - there was a small hand on his crotch, not grabbing or claiming, just stroking, and he groaned again when he realized there was only one person that hand could belong to.

She kissed his cheek with a smile on her lips, he could tell, and she lingered there possibly far too long, her hand coming up to brush his belly, stopping shortly at his nipples before returning low again.

“Good morning,” she whispered, her voice still clouded by sleep, too, and Phil felt this overwhelming need to open his eyes, look at her, before pleasure would fully take over his mind and he would just be seeing red. Her hair was in disarray, the imprint of her pillow’s creases on her cheek, and her smile was so sweet and sleepy his heart skipped a beat. She leaned up to kiss him, deeply, chasing most of the cobwebs away, her tongue coming out briefly to tease his lips, before she pulled away and started a trail down his neck, and unfortunately, his cock had a suspicion of what was going to happen, and it twitched against her hand. It was far from smooth and gentlemanly, but she just chuckled and sucked a hickey into his neck, matching the one he knew he had implanted in her neck in much the same place the night before.

She was still kissing her way down his body, not rushing into anything, sucking one of his nipples into her mouth to tease, sending more blood down. When she had reached his belly, he put a hand in her hair and made her look at him.

“You don’t have to do this,” he panted, even though he would love to see this continued, but in her current pregnant state, she had only given him blowjobs when she had wanted to satisfy him, without it resulting in actual sex, and even after that night’s revelations on both sides, he was still afraid she wouldn’t want to make love. They had made plenty of love after that, of course, but the first few months of her pregnancy had frightened him a little. His sex drive had been woken up again by her on Tahiti and he couldn’t just turn it off again.

Besides, he couldn’t imagine blowjobs were very pleasant for anyone performing them, and he didn’t want her to do anything she didn’t like. (Even though he knew full well how much she loved this.)

“Let me do this,” she countered, kissing his belly, “you took such good care of me last night.”

He let go of her hair, still not convinced she should continue on this path, but then he looked down at her, still as gloriously naked as last night, her tongue and fingers already trying to tease him as much as possible… he knew he wouldn’t stop her. 

And god, she always claimed he was good with his hands, sending her into orgasms with just that touch, but she was not too bad herself, especially when her lips came out to play and wrapped around his cock slowly. 

He could tell his talk about making love had gotten to her, because while she had always considered blowjobs to be about both their pleasure (and it really still was), he could tell that this was just about him, about her exploring his body, finding out what he liked (even though they had been together sexually for nearly eight months, there were still things to be discovered about each other) and what made him grab her hair in an attempt to control the feelings, the pleasure, and could he really be blamed when he started to moan while throwing his head back, giving in to the pleasure she was giving him?

“I love you,” he heard her say, as though from a faraway distance, even though the vibrations of her words made him groan, and he felt her chuckle against his cock, which nearly sent him over the edge.

“Do you want to finish?” she asked him, her hand still stroking up and down his cock, while she came up slowly to kiss him, and he could taste himself on her lips, could feel how red they were before he even saw them, but just before he pushed her onto her back to fuck her roughly, his heart, which was still madly in love with her, stopped him.

Sex was fun, especially with her, but it would always leave him just that little bit unsatisfied, even though they had both reached orgasms. Sure, he could be satisfied, alright, but he would hardly be closer to learning what her body tasted and felt like, and he so loved to take his time, if only to have her writhing in his arms, begging for more. 

So he just kissed her again, letting her hand stroke him, and he couldn’t stop himself from putting his hand on her, too. They were both lying on their sides now, facing each other, her pregnant belly poking him, and his hand brushed that first, feeling her up, as though her belly would have gained such width overnight that he would be able to tell. The baby usually responded to him when he put his hand on her belly like that, so he guessed they were still asleep, which was probably better.

He even made the mistake of brushing her breasts, having faced criticism from her before because they were sensitive, but she only smiled against his lips when he did it, and it spurred him on. He hadn’t touched her breasts in ages, much less grabbed them or kissed them, so the prospect of her not stopping him now turned him on considerably. 

“Melinda-”

She shut him up by kissing him, which always made his heart leap, then when she was certain he wouldn’t say anything, pulled back slightly to look at him. Her hand was still working his erection, but her movements had slowed down even more than they already had been.

“Your talk a few weeks back had me thinking,” she whispered, looking into his eyes, then her eyes landed on every single inch of his face. He felt warm under her stare. “Making love isn’t about taking - it’s about giving. And you’ve been giving me… the whole world. And I haven’t exactly returned the favor.”

“You don’t have to.”

“But that’s the thing. I do. Because we’re equal, you and I. I love you, and I want us to be on the same level.”

“We are.”   
She raised an eyebrow at him and he rolled his eyes at her, causing both of them to grin.

“Phil,” she whispered, “I’ve only been giving you blowjobs to make up for the fact that I didn’t want to have sex. But it takes away from the joy of blowjobs…”   
And he knew she loved to give blowjobs, in their early weeks together, before finding out she was pregnant, that was just her way of warming both of them up. 

“It’s so intimate and real, and I know… you’ve missed it. So, I’ll be returning it into our sex life.”

Her matter-of-fact tone completely went against the sensual, satisfying movements of her hand on his cock, and it made him smile even brighter.

“Just because you can’t go down on me, doesn’t mean I can’t go down on you,” she stated, already moving down to resume where she had left off. It was possibly the only negative thing about this whole pregnancy - her doctor had warned her that oral sex could seriously endanger the safety of the baby, and that they should try to avoid it as much as possible, and even though she hadn’t been so enthusiastic about keeping the baby in the first few months, she was even less enthusiastic about willingly sending it into an ironic death. 

He missed it a lot, the taste of her pussy, the way her muscles would contract around his tongue while he was thrusting it into her and how her hands would hold onto his short hair tightly, as though she was afraid that he would pull back. 

Oh well. They were nearly at the end of this pregnancy, and while he loved looking at her belly, filled with life,  _ their _ baby, he couldn’t wait for her to feel a little more comfortable in her own body, which would ultimately result in more passionate lovemaking. (And, he added selfishly, he couldn’t wait to be buried between her legs again.)

“And don’t hold back,” she threw his way, pausing to relax her jaw, then she slowly worked him into a scream, her skilled, swollen lips around his member making him feel so much pleasure, he nearly cried under the sensations, and she kept sucking him while he came, drinking in his juices until he had nothing left to give.

She crawled into his arms when she was finished, and her gentle hands on his cheeks wiping his tears away made him cry even harder - he didn’t deserve someone like her, so kind and considerate and honestly immensely sexy, but she seemed to show him regularly that she was as much in love with him as he was with her, and it warmed him from the inside out. 

“I love you,” she whispered, kissing him gently, bringing him slowly down from his high. He knew now that them making love could bring out tears in both of them, not just from his heavily pregnant girlfriend, but from him, too, and he wasn’t even ashamed to admit it. 

“Melinda,” he breathed, still overcome with feelings, and she just smiled and buried her head in the crook of his neck - that space seemed to be made just for her, because she fit there perfectly. He wouldn’t be surprised if she had fallen asleep eventually, but when he got up to use the toilet, her strong hand which had been so gentle before, held onto his wrist tightly, almost bruising.

“Don’t leave,” she muttered, lowering her voice to hide the fear in it. He couldn’t believe she still thought that he could possibly leave her. 

“I’ll be right back.”

“Phil…”

“Hey, don’t worry. I just need to pee. I promise I’ll come back.”

Surprisingly, her magnificent blowjob had served to wake him up fully, but she was already half asleep again, and no matter how tough she acted while she was awake, sleepy Melinda May was quite emotional and almost impossible to reason with. Especially with these pregnancy hormones raging. Which is why, when she wouldn’t let go of his wrist, he just decided to pull her up into his arms and carry her with him to the bathroom, where he carefully set her down so he could do his business.

She looked at him with something akin to shame in her eyes, and when he was finished, he gathered her in his arms again, kissing her, hopefully letting her know that he would always stay by her side, if she wanted that. 

“That was ridiculous,” she whispered, retreating, but he didn’t let her. He shook his head and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. 

“You think after you worked your magic like that, I could just leave you?”

A blush spread on her cheeks and it made him smile, kissing her again. 

“Hey. Come back to bed with me. I promise I’ll stay.”

She let him guide her to the bed and he helped her get back into bed, her hair spread all around her on the pillow, and he had to take a few moments to gather himself at the sight of her, naked and pregnant in his bed, but then the need to be close to her took over and he hurried into her arms, kissing her again, feeling how she pulled him even closer to feel their skin touch as much as possible. 

“That was the baby,” she muttered, somewhat of a smile on her lips. He just stared at her for a few seconds, before shaking his head while smiling, planting some kisses in her neck.

He knew it wasn't, this was all her, with her insecurities and trust issues, the woman he loved so much. She had been broken beyond repair, but she had come such a long way since then.

Everybody always thought she couldn't feel anything, that she was cold and heartless, but he knew better than that. He had known her for decades, after all. He knew how much she felt, especially about him.

“I want to look at you,” she said. When he frowned, she explained. “When we're making love. I always want to look at you.”

He nodded and brushed her cheek, his lips settling there as well for a few moments.

“That's the whole point,” he replied, lowering his lips to her neck. “I love looking at you  while we’re making love.”

She smiled and blushed a little, which was the cherry on top of the cake. 

“I’ve never loved anyone like I love you,” she whispered, and it sounded like it was an afterthought, like she was going to backtrack and deny that she had said it, but she just lay in his arms for a few more minutes, brushing her hand through his chest hair, before looking up at him with the most gorgeous smile he had ever seen on her. “You make me so happy.”

She put his hand on her belly and he instantly felt the baby kicking up against his hand, indicating they were awake now, and possibly asking for attention. It always made his heart flutter, the idea that this was their baby, they had created this little wonder, and they were showing them that they couldn't wait to be with them, to meet them. He couldn't wait to meet his child. And he couldn't believe that at his age, he would still become a father.

She reached up to trace his face, but he stopped her hand and put it against his lips instead, taking in a deep breath and looking at her, this absolute beauty, and it confirmed his thoughts.

“Please marry me.”

He couldn’t blame her when her shock forced her hands back, and he didn’t try to keep them close, knowing he shouldn’t force her into anything. He had done enough of that, over the past seven months or so.

“What?”

He took his time to think about his next words, knowing he had to make up a little for the fact that he had blurted out those incredibly important words like that. Melinda deserved better than that. Their baby deserved better than that.

“I… I love you. I just… right in that moment, everything felt… perfect. You, our baby, peace… I never want this to stop. I never… want to wake up without you by my side.”

“Oh Phil…”

And then, he started rambling. Possibly his biggest character flaw. “We’ve been through so much and I guess, I, uhm… I was just under the impression that we were finally doing okay, with everything, you know? Nobody to chase us down anymore, no more robots trying to kill us or aliens imprisoning us. And I’ve known you for what, thirty years now? And you are just, everything to me and I can’t imagine not spending time with you and-”

She silenced him with a finger on his lips and he looked at her, still going over his words, her options. If she would refuse, he would accept that. He wouldn’t stop trying to win her over, though. She was everything he ever needed, together with their baby, and surely, she must feel the same way? At least a little?

“You talk a lot,” she whispered, and chuckled softly, lowering her hand and resting it in his neck. God, he knew that hand could snap his neck if it wanted to, could break his bones, flip him over, hurt him badly, but somehow, it had decided that with him, it would be loving and gentle. “Phil. I want you to be serious about this.”

“I am serious.” He gathered her closer in his arms, kissing her forehead. “I’ll buy you an engagement ring. I’ll look into family houses first thing in the morning. I’ll get paperwork finalizing us adopting Daisy. I’ve seen some snapshots of life without you, and I can’t possibly live that way. I… I won’t. And… I know that you never wanted to get married after… Andrew, and I get that, but… I want things to be final. For the baby. For Daisy.  _ For us. _ And… I just want you close. Forever, if possible.”

“Stop talking,” she said, but she had waited for a pause this time, not interrupting him. She was considerate like that. And he had blown this entire proposal, but he realized that was to be expected if you decided in the minute before you popped the question that you would even do that in the first place.

Why did he always mess up the things that mattered the most?

They were silent for a few minutes after that, his heart beating frantically in his chest while her hand covered it, toying with his chest hair a little, and it made him even more nervous to realize that she must be feeling his frantic heartbeat beneath her fingers and still didn’t do anything to stop that. He was assuming the worst now, wasn’t he? What was he always trying to teach her, and the team, for that matter? 

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“I’ll marry you.”

That was less the romantic answer he had expected, but he had to remember this was still Melinda May, and while their baby was making her feel more emotional, especially in the last few months, she still sometimes used her mask to hide what was truly underneath it. He guessed she would never quite shake that.

“Okay,” he replied, adopting her deadpan tone. 

She frowned and looked at him.

“Okay?”

And when their eyes met, they both broke into big smiles and she even giggled and he couldn’t keep it in anymore, needed to feel her close, needed to kiss her, tell her how much he loved her, how happy he was that she would be his wife, that they would have a baby together, that they would be a family.

But when their lips met, all words died on his tongue.

There was time for words later. Right now, he got lost in the feel of her lips against his, her hands pulling him closer, and absentmindedly, he noticed their baby kicking against him.

How had he gotten so damn lucky?


	4. Post-partum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, didn't update for a while, sorry for that! Also, May gets more and more emotional in this story, and all of my stories, for that matter. I really think that there's more to her than just her ice-queen appearance. *shrug*

Their baby girl was only about three weeks old when Melinda had dropped hints that she wished she could have more of an appetite for sex, and that thought lingered in the months following little Amelia’s birth. He always told her that she could take as long as she needed, not wanting to force her into anything. (He would have totally understood if she had never wanted to have sex after that traumatic birth.) He wouldn't blame her at all.

But eventually, tension rose, as they felt more like roommates than lovers, and with some hormones still raging inside of her, Melinda snapped about three months later.

It wasn't even about anything significant, he could hardly remember what it was about, but she pushed him and yelled at him while tears were trying to escape her eyes. It was apparent in that moment, as it had been many times before, that she was exhausted beyond belief and he was once again failing in his duties as her partner.

“Okay, take a deep breath-”

She pushed him again, swearing in Mandarin, and when the tears escaped her eyes, he wrapped his arms tightly around her, not taking her shit, knowing he should comfort her and finally doing so.

“My love,” he whispered, brushing her hair. “I've got you.”

“Why am I like this, Phil?”

“Like what?”

She shrugged and nestled closer to his chest, her arms around his middle a little tighter with each passing breath.

“You gave birth to a baby, Melinda.”

“But it shouldn't mean that I don't pay attention to you anymore.”

“Your priorities shifted. I'll manage.”

She looked up at him and he laughed at her raised eyebrow.

“Phil?”

“Melinda?”

“I want to try.”

“Try what?”

“To make love.”

“Okay.”

They looked at each other for a while, arms still holding on tightly, until Amelia made herself known and Melinda retreated, her tears dry on her cheeks, something akin to disappointment in her eyes.

“I'll call Daisy, she can babysit Amelia.”

“But, I need to breastfeed her…”

“Just for the afternoon. She can drop her off tonight.”

“Phil… I…”

“You draw a hot bath. I'll take care of everything.”

There was more fight left within her but she gave in when she noticed he wouldn't give up. They kissed, his arm pulling her flush against him, before they parted to go their separate ways.

About half an hour later he found her in their tub, her head resting on the edge but he could still tell she wasn't quite relaxed.

“I'm so tired,” she whispered as he climbed into the tub, leaning against the opposite end and looking at her. God, he wanted to touch her, but he knew when to back off and this was one of those times. Even if she had brought up the idea of sex herself. He didn't want to make matters worse.

“I'm sorry,” she said, rubbing at her eyes and sitting up a little straighter.

“For what?”

“For being such an emotional mess.”

“Melinda…” He looked at her, then settled for a different approach. “What can I do to make you feel better?”

She huffed and he moved closer.

“No, I'm serious. I can only do so much before I run out of ideas. So, tell me.”

She promptly climbed into his lap, reminding him briefly of that night, her very pregnant belly in between them, and just like then, she wrapped her arms around his neck.

“Make me feel more than just breastfeeding and changing diapers.”

He didn't let her say that twice and placed a kiss in her neck.

“Stop me any time you want.”

While he had a lot of things on his mind that he could do with her, to her, his own words from weeks before reverberated in his head - this was not about him, this was not even about them. This was about her - he loved her, so much, and she was feeling bad about herself while he knew she was so much better than her insecurities were showing her. He could make her feel better, he knew that, and he would do so, if she only let him.

He kissed her, slow and gentle, and he realized (with shame) that they had not taken enough time to do this properly, not just making love but simply kissing, being close, hugging and touching - their little miracle had kept them up so much that whenever they were together, alone, they were in bed and out like a light. Especially Melinda, who was still trying to heal from the birth and needed all the rest she could get. (In hindsight, a pregnancy in her fifties was less than ideal, even if it was Melinda, who was strong, healthy, fit.)

She was getting impatient, her hands pulling him closer, but he would take his sweet time, like he had always done before and he knew that it would drive her mad, but she was always satisfied afterwards. He wanted to see her smile, at least for a little bit, before she would ultimately fall asleep and finally rest properly for once.

“Phil,” she breathed, her hand in the back of his neck almost painfully. He silenced her by kissing her, as softly as he had before, running his hand through her damp hair. He would take this slow, let them get used to each other and their bodies again.

He ran a hand down her body, stroking all of her skin as much as he could, cherishing her - she had changed after their baby, that was to be expected. She hated the new her, but he found she was only more beautiful now. Now, there weren't just scars or other marks on her body from all the death she had avoided - now, she had scars showing of the life she had carried, which was so much more significant.

When he ended up where she most wanted him, he found her wet but not wet enough. And that was unacceptable to him, she should feel as little pain as possible, she should enjoy this more than he was.

“Let's get you into bed,” he whispered, biting softly into her earlobe and smiling when he heard her gasp. She was getting more and more restless with the minute, her own hand lowering to his cock, but he skillfully swatted it away before getting out of the tub and offering her a hand. (Maybe twenty years ago, he could have stepped out of the tub with her in his arms, but he knew he wouldn't be able to carry that off at this age without either of them getting seriously hurt.)

“Phil-”

“Come.”

She raised an eyebrow, her skin flushed, but she still came with him.

“I like bath sex,” she muttered after he had dried her off (kissing her when he was close enough, and not just her lips) and she shuffled off to their bedroom. He watched her walk away, then gathered everything he thought they would need, water bottles and some towels, you never knew.

He found her on the bed, somehow having found her phone after he had hidden it to preserve some calm in her mind. Her brow was furrowed, and he feared that everything he had been doing to her in the bath had been for nothing, her stress returning.

“Drop the phone,” he stated, watching her debating internally between scolding him back or laugh at him, but she dropped it eventually.

“I just wanted to check on Amelia.”

He nodded, he understood, but he wouldn’t allow her to make her mind stray from anything other than them making love.

He pushed her onto her back and smiled when her eyes were already closed. He kissed her lips and brushed her hair out of her face.

“Just relax,” he whispered, as he kissed a path down her body, her breasts, her belly button, skipping her center and kissing down her legs, the hollow of her knees, her cute little toes. When he looked up at her, her head was thrown back and her hands were holding on to the sheets beside her. He came back up and kissed her lips, and her hands cradled his cheeks.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I should give you more.”

He shook his head, kissing the skin between her breasts. “You’re already giving me more than enough.”

He kissed her swell of her belly first, where there were still traces of their dearest Amelia’s occupancy, and he loved to see it, even though Melinda hated it. He loved to see that this beautiful body had produced something so amazing, so pure and perfect, and he secretly hoped she would always carry some of the added weight. Even though, for her sake, he hoped she didn’t.

He slowly made his way down, his hands on her knees spreading her legs. He already saw his heart’s desire there, glistening, inviting, and his heart made several leaps inside his chest. She would always try and keep him from oral sex, claiming he wouldn’t like it as much as she did, but just as with her performing oral sex on him, both parties thoroughly enjoyed the act. Maybe he liked it even more than she did.

And he had missed this so much. He hadn't gone down on her in almost a year.

“Phil-“ But her words were cut off by her own moaning when he kissed her clit, his tongue coming out to lick a few circles around it, and he just had to smile. He loved her so much, every single inch of her, every personality trait, every kiss she gave him.

He licked and sucked like he was a man who had been starving to death, like he had been crawling through a desert and she was the much anticipated oasis. She tasted so good. He loved her so much.

He slowly raised her pleasure, mostly using his tongue and sometimes having his fingers join. One finger slipped inside her, he didn't want to push it too far by having multiple fingers thrust inside her immediately (in the beginning of their relationship, he'd had three fingers thrusting roughly inside her countless of times, but that seemed unnecessary while he sucked gently on her clit). The single finger seemed enough for the moment. She loved the friction and he loved hearing her moans get louder and louder.

He looked up at her often, between her spread legs, the swell of her belly and her full breasts, and he loved to see her like this, on cloud nine it seemed, her skin flushed all over, her hands searching for something to hold onto, anything at all. He missed his longer hair at that moment - he would have loved to have her slender fingers pull on his scalp while he was eating her out.

He was suddenly very aware of what he looked like, ever since he had started this relationship with her. Every inch of her was perfect, smooth skin, muscles trained, and he was just… old. Graying, balding, chest full of hair, his stomach sticking out. How could she fall for someone like him?

But then he looked up at her, her face full of bliss, and he realized he might still have something going for him - he was good with his mouth and fingers. And that worked in her favor.

But still. He wasn't good looking like her, he wasn't fat but he wasn't very much trained either. He was nearly bald-

Her hand gently swatted the top of his head and he frowned. Until he realized that he had stopped moving and it was driving her mad. He loved it only briefly before lowering himself quickly to her vulva again.

It wasn’t long until she was crying out, his name, their non-existent deities, anything. Her hands came down to hold onto his head, and he thrust his finger deep inside her, feeling her contract around it.

“Phil!” she pressed out, her voice considerably higher than it usually was. Her cheeks were red and he smiled against her flesh, still licking her as though she wasn't already in an intense orgasm.

His name had never sounded as good as when she said it, in whatever way possible. When she yelled it out in anger or frustration, when she whispered it in her quiet, sensitive moments, but especially when she moaned it, breathed it when he had made her come, when he was driving her so mad she just begged him to fuck her. It was less fucking now and more making love, but he still loved it when she told him to just skip the teasing and push inside her.

He drew out her orgasm for as long as he could, curling his finger so he could hit just the right spot inside her.

He knew, however, when she was too breathless to accept more pleasure and he shuffled up the bed, wrapping his arms around her and watching her recover from her orgasm.

She was smiling, and he was so relieved, she hadn’t smiled much in the past few weeks. Her hand came up to rest gently on his cheek and she closed her eyes in bliss.

“Damn,” she whispered. “I can’t believe it’s been that long.”

He chuckled and kissed her. “I love you.”

She sighed happily and kissed him, too. “I love you, too.”

Her hand reached down to once again grab his cock but he linked their hands and kissed the corner of her mouth instead. This was about her, not his cock.

“Now that I’ve warmed you up,” he teased, “are you ready for round two?”

She kissed him as a response, pushing him onto his back and laying over him, not quite covering him, only their chests crossed. It was him who pulled her on top of him completely, her legs straddling him. She gasped against his lips when his cock brushed past her flesh.

Their eyes met, and he saw lust there, passion, but also fear, and somehow he instantly knew what it was for. (Amelia's birth had been nothing short of traumatic, but also tough on her body, she had needed several stitches down there and she hadn't been able to walk on her own for at least a week.)

“Mel?”

She didn't respond and instead kissed him, but he stopped her.

“Are you sure you want to do this, Melinda?”

“I have to.”

He frowned. “No you don't.”

She sat back and looked at him, her frustration from before returning. He wanted to reach for her and just hug her, he didn't want to do anything she wasn't ready for.

“Melinda?”

She sighed and lay down beside him, turning her back towards him.

No. She wouldn't get to walk away this easily. They were married for God's sake. They should be able to talk about this.

He put a hand on her arm and looked at her over her shoulder. She pulled on the covers until they were buried under them and she remained silent for a long time.

His heart hurt at this sight before him. He wanted her to be happy, he wanted her to smile and laugh and kiss him and tell him she loved him. He felt like he had failed as a husband.

“I love you, you know,” he whispered, his hand still on her arm. But he gave her space if she wanted some.

“I'm so sorry,” she replied, and he heard the tears in her voice, and he gingerly wrapped an arm around her underneath hers, pulling her flush against him. He kissed her temple. “I don't know what is wrong with me.”

“Nothing is wrong with you, my love. You had a baby. I'm an asshole.”

She huffed and turned onto her back, looking at him. He brushed her cheek.

“You're not an asshole, Phil. If anyone is an asshole, it's me.”

He shook his head.

“I shouldn't have started about that second round. The first was more than enough.”

She chuckled and he looked at her. His heart warmed at the sight of her like this, this was the woman he had fallen in love with, his wife, the mother of his child. There was nothing about her that he couldn't love.

“Phil…” she whispered. “I know it will hurt. That's what's keeping me back. It has nothing to do with you.”

A flood of relief washed over him but they weren't out of the woods yet. He kissed her cheek and looked her in the eye again.

“We can work with that. I don't want to force you… but we've got time now.”

She was silent for a while and then looked at him again. She didn't say anything but kissed him instead, pushing him onto his back again and covering him.

“Wait. I have to get some things first. Don't go anywhere.” He kissed her and left the bed, rummaging through the bathroom cabinets and rushing back. She was just pushing the covers back down as he entered the room, and she looked at what he was holding.

Lube. And-

“Condoms?” she asked him, almost in a disappointed way. He smiled briefly and settled beside her again, kissing her first before getting to work.

“We need to get you lubed up. A condom will help.”

She was starting to understand what he was going to do and smiled, faintly, touching his arm.

“How could I ever think that you're an asshole when you do things like this?”

He didn't regard her comment and got the bottle of lube. He squirted some onto his fingers and as he lay down beside her, kissing her, he traced her pussy carefully.

“You weren't that careful with round one,” she muttered, still kissing him and putting one hand in the back of his neck. He rolled his eyes and added a bit more force, dipping one finger inside her. She kissed him again and that was where her words ended for a while, kissing him, looking at him, the corners of her lips twisting up.

He added a little more lube and then dipped a second finger inside. She gasped softly now, putting their foreheads together.

“How does this feel?” he asked her, thrusting inside her a little. She nodded and he picked up the pace slightly, kissing a corner of her mouth. His thumb came to rest on her clit, but he was careful not to add too much friction. She responded well, however, and he was feeling increasingly confident in her desire to take this further.

“Phil,” she gasped, and he already felt her orgasm approaching. “Now!”

He had planned for her to be on top but her demand came so suddenly, he barely had enough logic in his mind left to put on a condom before he settled between her spread legs and nudged her entrance with his length.

“We can stop any time you want,” he whispered, kissing her lips, but she was already far gone, her legs wrapping around his waist and her eyes closed in part concentration, part bliss. But her expression changed a little when he slid inside, pain, and he would have pulled back immediately if it weren't for her arms and legs keeping him in place. The last thing he wanted was to hurt her.

“Give me a minute,” she whispered, and he obeyed, giving her space and air while she accommodated to his size. When her hips moved and one of her hands held onto the back of his neck, he thrust inside her fully, but gently, not wanting to hurt her. He looked down to where they were joined, and he prayed to God that she was enjoying this too, and not just putting up a front for him. He really, _really_ didn't want to hurt her.

Yet when he looked up at her face, he had his answer - her eyes were closed in bliss and a smile was pulling on her lips.

“I love you,” he whispered against her cheek, and her hands simply held onto him tighter, spurring him on.

He turned them around after a while, feeling her orgasm approach, and she smiled and kissed him before pushing up against his chest.

They hadn’t done this in a while. Now that he thought of it, she hadn’t been on top like this since they had found out she was pregnant. At first, they had shied away from sex altogether, and when they had picked it back up, they had both realized that it was about much more than sex now, it was about exploring each other and the connection they had, knowing they were going to be together like this for a long time. And anyway, her pregnant belly had seriously limited the positions they could have had sex in, her back killing her, and so the only times she was on top was when they were taking a bath together, and she could lean comfortably against the edge of the tub.

But now here she was, in all her glory and beauty, and it turned him on even more. She loved it when he took control, but he absolutely lived for it when she did, he loved seeing this powerful, beautiful, strong woman give herself completely to him in this way, while it could have so easily been the opposite. (Her, kicking his ass in a thousand different ways if he even thought about touching her intimately.) She had chosen him. She had fallen in love with him. And here she was, straddling his hips, his cock deep inside her and her skin flushed all over - she was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen.

She threw her head back and briefly curled her fingers into his chest hair, before moving, slow and gentle. She searched for his hands and he held hers tightly, before she lowered one to where they were joined. My God. What a turn on it was to feel him slide inside her like this, his fingers brushing against her clitoris, and she faltered slightly at that touch. She liked that. He did it again, and her mouth fell open into a perfect ‘o’.

All of this was his. The dark hair that tickled his skin so pleasantly when they cuddled, the hooded eyes that had once been so ice cold but were now showing what happy things were going on inside her, the full, beautiful breasts that he could finally suck into his mouth. For extra measure, he leaned up and did just that, just a little surprised when he drew some milk. He understood why Amelia spent so much time here.

He looked up at her and their eyes met.

“Did you just…” He feared she would want to stop now, that was wrong of him and he should have known. She was still breastfeeding their baby so of course he would draw some milk when he sucked on her niples. But just as he was about to retreat, she laughed. “I can’t believe you just did that.”

“I’m sorry.”

“No. Nope. Nothing to be sorry for.” She kissed him and put their foreheads together. “You can do it again if you want.”

He stared at her for a moment before smiling at her and sucking the other nipple into his mouth. Just for a taste. He was just curious. Amelia wouldn’t just spend most of her days sucking Melinda’s breasts if it wasn’t at least a little tasty, right? It really was. But, at the same time, he felt he was stealing Amelia’s food supply and stopped, although his hands still cupped her breasts and teased around the nipples. (And admittedly, it was a little weird, even if he was happy he had gotten the opportunity to do this.)

She rocked in his lap and reignited the flames. And all he wanted was to kiss her and have his arms wrapped around her tightly and rock her into orgasm. So he did that last one - he lowered himself back onto the bed and thrust upwards, watching her slip quickly into pleasure again, and after two handfuls of thrusts, she was contracting all around him and slumped against his chest, panting. He wanted to hold out but she was still coming, and he just let pleasure take over, until they lay as one united pile of limbs and flesh.

He turned so she came to lie on her side and made sure she was supported in all the right ways. He ditched the condom and wrapped his arms around her tightly.

She was smiling at him brightly, sweat on her forehead.

“You sucked my breasts,” she whispered, amusement in her voice. He nodded and brushed her damp hair out of her face and behind her ears.

“I kind of forgot that you’re breastfeeding,” he added, feeling like an idiot, and she just giggled. “It was the heat of the moment. I guess I just missed kissing your breasts.”

“You liked it?”

“It was… kind of nice. But weird. I felt like I was invading Amy’s private space. Even though it was mine before it was hers.” He shook his head. He was rambling again. “I don’t think I’ll be doing it again anytime soon, not until Amy has stopped breastfeeding.”

She just smiled and brushed the sides of his face.

“I can’t wait.”

He grinned and kissed her deeply, his hands on her skin pulling her closer to him.

“What did you think about that made you stop?” she asked him suddenly. He frowned.

“What?”

“When you were eating me out.” She didn't even blush when she said it. “You stopped.”

It was silly now, wasn't it? Of course she loved him. He didn't know what drove her to do that but she did.

“I'm nearly bald.”

She smiled faintly and brushed the top of his head. “I've noticed.”

“I have a lot of chest hair.”

She rolled her eyes and kissed the corner of his mouth. He didn't miss her hand running through his chest hair. “I guess so.”

“Why do you love me, Melinda?”

Her smile dropped a little but her hands remained on him. She was quiet for a moment before continuing.

“I just do, Phil. I know you think you're not worthy of me. But you so are. You've helped me through so much shit. You did it all as my friend. And then one morning, I woke up and there you were. And I knew I loved you. Not just as my friend, but… I was in love with you. I still am, I guess. Although… being in love fades after a while, you know? But loving someone, that shit's forever.”

He stared at her for a while and she was getting a little uncomfortable under his look. He knew her.

“I think you're absolutely beautiful,” she whispered. “You're perfect to me. And I don't just say that to get into your panties. I look at you and I wonder how it is possible that you love me. That you're willing to sacrifice your life for me.”

He nodded frantically when she paused and she smiled. He brushed a hand through her hair.

“And you're the father of my children. That seals the deal.”

“Children?” As in plural?

She rolled her eyes again. “Phil. Daisy is as much our daughter as Amelia is.”

She was right, of course. She smiled and kissed him and he automatically wrapped an arm around her tightly.

“I love you,” he whispered, caressing her cheek when they parted for air.

“I love you, too.”

He was trying to tell his cock not to do anything, to keep this moment pure and decent, but Melinda just giggled as it grew slightly against her leg anyway - her giggles made it swell considerably which just embarrassed him much to her amusement. He was rendered mostly breathless, he didn't have the stamina anymore to do this three times in a row but his erection was sure telling a different story.

“I'm an old man, Melinda.”

“Boohoo. Your cock is showing something else.” She successfully grabbed his length, something he had been preventing all afternoon, and he saw stars for a moment.

“Round three?” she teased. She rolled onto her back and made him lie on top of her, her strong legs keeping him close. She reached for his cock and lined it up with her pussy - he protested, he wasn't wearing a condom, he wanted to warm her up properly, he didn't want her to hurt, but her hips lifted and he slid inside her, causing them both to groan.

“I love you,” she breathed.

He took it slow, his favorite way of making love now, not set out for a quick release but rather take his time, look at Melinda properly, being able to kiss her when he wanted and brush her naked skin when he thrust inside her.

“You're so beautiful,” he whispered, his forehead against hers. She sighed and a smile pulled on her lips but her eyes remained closed. She was putty underneath him and he loved her little smiles and sighs and the way her hand reached up and touched his cheek without her having to look, like she had an internal radar as to where he was.

And then suddenly, she had reached the edge of the world and was about to fall off - her eyes opened and they focused on him, almost questioning him, and he knew what they were asking.

“I've got you. I promise.”

Her eyes rolled back and so did her head, and she came so wonderfully Coulson just wanted to take a picture of this view and frame it. His name was on her lips. And as her orgasm faded away, his thrusts still rocking her body, she was basically already half-asleep. He smiled, let go and came inside her, seeing her try to support him like he had supported her. But she was sleepy and that was okay and he let her fall asleep slowly, his kisses on her gorgeous lips pulling a soft smile. He made sure she was warm and comfortable before going to clean them both up.

She was asleep for most of the afternoon, even after Daisy had returned Amelia and the little girl was letting them know that she was, in fact, awake. Melinda came into the living room with a blush on her face and Coulson chuckled. She was wearing her bathrobe which he had prominently placed on his side of the bed, not wanting her to walk around naked while Daisy was here. (But of course, if they were alone, he would be the first to undo the tie and slide it off her shoulders.)

“What's that blush for?” He really didn't mind, though. It looked adorable on her. And she would totally kill him if she heard his thoughts. She glared at him and he chuckled. She must think her glaring had an effect on him. Cute.

“You screwed me into sleep,” she deadpanned. Coulson chuckled again but remained quiet. He definitely knew why.

“Hey, May.”

Melinda's eyes widened but she didn't let the new voice alter her expression. She raised an eyebrow and looked over Coulson's shoulder.

“Hey Daisy.” Melinda looked him in the eye again. “How long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough.”

“Hmm.”

Coulson smiled at Melinda who was only partly amused. She walked to Amelia and kissed the little girl's cheek, who lightened up at the sight of her mother. May moved towards Daisy and the young woman stepped out of the way awkwardly. Coulson watched the scene unfold with light amusement. Daisy knew what he and Melinda had been doing in Amelia's absence, she wasn't stupid.

“You, uh, you look good,” Daisy said, although it was close to muttering. Coulson had heard, and so had Melinda, but she pretended she hadn't.

“What was that?”

“You look good.”

“I do?” Melinda knew exactly what she was doing. Coulson loved it. “I'm glad.”

Melinda walked towards him with her back towards Daisy and she actually winked. She smiled and winked and was standing a little too close to him when she passed.

“It was my pleasure,” Coulson said before he could stop it. Melinda chuckled behind him as Daisy responded.

“OH MY GOD. I'M LEAVING.”

Daisy threw doors shut on her way out but Coulson could tell she was fighting a smile anyway. Coulson turned to Melinda and kissed her before she could do anything else.

“We embarrassed her.”

Melinda shrugged. “I don't care.”

He smiled and wrapped his arms around her, lifted her onto the kitchen counter and kissed her. He spread her legs so he could step in between them. He knew he shouldn't start this, not here, because they wouldn't be able to finish. But he just couldn't help himself.

“I've only been gone a minute,” Daisy groaned as she returned to the kitchen. Neither Melinda nor Coulson did anything to lessen Daisy's discomfort. “Get a fucking room.”

“We already have one of those,” Coulson joked. Daisy liked it but didn't want to show it.

“You're in our house,” Melinda chose a different strategy.

“Whatever.”

Daisy grabbed the thing she had forgotten and waved at them. She wasn't angry, just embarrassed, and wasn't it the parents’ job to embarrass their children as much as possible?

“Right,” Coulson said with a bright smile. “Where were we?”

And he kissed Melinda deeply, eventually causing her to slip out of his arms to prevent them from making love here on the kitchen counter. He wouldn't really mind, but he understood it was inappropriate with their infant looking on.

“You horny old man,” Melinda laughed as she tended to their baby daughter again. Coulson just spread his arms at those words.

“You know you love it!”

A sappy smile from Melinda was the only response he got. It was enough.

All-in-all, not such a failed afternoon.


	5. Baby love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, been a while! Thanks for sticking around and hope you enjoy the new chapter!

They made more of an effort to take time off for each other. Their four months of celibacy had been a hard lesson learned - they might not always have time for hours worth of steamy lovemaking, but some steamy quickies had definitely been in order, or even just a few minutes of Coulson licking Melinda into orgasm or Melinda driving him absolutely insane by riding him. 

It was good. There were no more tensions, at least not caused by sexual frustration - there were just some awkward moments of Daisy catching them in their foreplay in the kitchen. Amelia, in any case, was too young to understand what was happening or to even remember it.

“If I'm going to be living here,” Daisy started firmly while they were breakfasting at the kitchen table, “we have to have some proper rules in play.”

It felt odd to have their child discipline them but Daisy was right. Melinda and him had been acting like teenagers, having found a new thirst for sex. 

“Closed doors stay closed. If you don't want anyone to have a front seat on your…  _ escapades _ , for God's sake, lock the door. And no sex on any surface I also use to eat or sit on. And I'm not going to get out of bed to calm down Amelia every time you're banging.”

Melinda just smiled while she was preparing her ritualistic tea. Rooibos tea, which she only really drank after a nice lovemaking session. Her smirk as their eyes met brought back memories from just an hour before.

He had woken up with morning wood which was hardly a surprise anymore. (He hadn't woken up with morning wood in years. Now, it was almost an everyday occurrence.)

She had still been asleep and she had looked so peaceful, so beautiful, like she wouldn't simply snap someone's neck if they said or did something stupid. He had simply settled for watching her, keeping his hands mostly to himself. Sure, his cock had been brushing against her butt but that was just a side-effect of spooning her like this. 

But it had been her who had moaned in her sleep, those moans he recognized now as being caused by pleasure. 

“Phil…”

She was still dreaming, right? He looked at her face briefly and got his answer.

She moaned again. That must be quite the dream she was having. Perhaps he could make it a reality.

He slipped his hands down her body, tracing her nipples through her shirt, brushed her belly (which was almost flat again because of her constant need to exercise) and reached the top of her shorts. It had never really stopped him, especially not with those moans she was letting out, but she was asleep and she couldn't technically give her consent. Even if they were married, even if they were comfortable sexually, consent mattered to him. 

He decided to cup her through her shorts, the material thin enough not to be a very big obstruction, and her panties so flimsy he could probably tear it off her with just his teeth. 

Shit. His erection grew. Unconsciously, she wiggled her butt against his front and it took quite some restraint not to grab hold of his cock and just finish himself off. This was all for her. She could do with his cock whatever she wanted. When she would wake up.

He kissed her neck and found her clit through all these layers of fabric, rubbing around it gently with two fingers. Her moans grew slightly louder and he was still unsure whether she was awake or not.

That was, until her hand grabbed his wrist and she made him dive underneath her shorts and panties and he smiled and kissed her neck again before finding her flesh. She was already wet and he realized those dreams really must have been very nice.

She sighed and her head fell back against him and he divulged - one finger slid inside her while his thumb gently rubbed her clit, and she sighed and moaned and came within moments, unraveling in his arms.

“Hmm.”

She turned around and he loved that sleepy smile on her lips and kissed her deeply.

“Morning,” she mumbled, and she put her hand in the back of his neck and they kissed again. “You can do that again.”

“Alright.” His hand was already down the front of her shorts but she chuckled and swatted it away. 

“It was a matter of speaking.”

She was still smiling when he linked their lips again. 

“That was some dream.”

“I dreamt you were wearing a maid's uniform and you weren't wearing any underwear.”

“You weren't.” She remained quiet with that cheeky little smile on her lips. “You weren't though, right?”

She chuckled and kissed him and it wasn't easy to let her change the subject of the maid uniform. Although, if she found that hot, he would do that for her.

“What was your dream about?”

“You, of course.” She was silent for a while and averted her eyes. “Phil… how do you feel about masturbation?”

He almost laughed. If only she knew what his true thoughts on that were and how often she had been in his fantasies front and center even before they had gotten together. 

He was only a little ashamed. Most of what he had fantasized about was reality now. (Her incredible blowjobs or her riding him were honestly better than the fantasies.)

“I dreamt that we were masturbating together.”

Damn. Her fantasies were way better than his. He just dreamed of fucking her hard; she dreamed of them coming closer sexually. 

“Would you be willing to try that?” she asked him, as though he would object to something so sexy. He hadn't really seen Melinda finger herself much, not at all, now that he thought about it. But he wondered if it could be satisfying for her to just look at him jacking off. That wasn't sexy, right?

She smiled as his cock swelled against her thigh and pushed away from him a little. “Your brain’s certainly not up here,” tapping his head, and he groaned. 

“You trick me by saying such sexy things.”

“You think it's sexy?”

“Melinda May. Just lay back and put your hands on yourself.”

“So romantic.”

But she did what he told her to do and undressed quickly, and he groaned as more and more naked skin was revealed to him. He couldn't help it to lean in and kiss her and right in that moment they were interrupted. 

Amelia needed some attention, and was letting that fact be known from across the hall. Melinda's eyes showed him how disappointed she was but he wouldn't let that last. She was turned on now and he was determined to keep her like that.

“Stay there. I'll check up on her, I'll come back quickly.”

She nodded and he kissed her again before leaving. He turned back into the bedroom quickly to put on his bathrobe; he was hard underneath his boxer shorts and that was a sight only Melinda should see. Probably. (He didn't know if Daisy had sneaked into the house in the middle of the night and she would definitely not appreciate seeing him like that.)

Amelia smiled at the sight of him and he only felt a little guilty he was being this selfish. He would give her some more attention when his wife wasn't waiting naked in their bed for him to return. He cuddled Amelia close and changed her diaper and she was quickly dozing off again, and he kissed her forehead before rushing back to the bedroom. 

Where he found a flushed Melinda leaning against the headboard, legs spread, and two fingers slowly thrusting inside herself. 

God. She was a mastermind. He had never seen anything sexier. She hardly seemed to notice that he was there and he remedied it by placing a kiss on her knee and her eyes flew open. He could tell how close she was and made quick work of what little clothes he was wearing before joining her on the bed.

“Melinda…”

He cupped her breasts briefly, unable to control himself for long. It was so easy to just pull her down and push inside but this was her fantasy, and he was willing to do something else for a change. 

He settled on the other side of the bed, pushing the covers all the way to the ground and put his legs in front of him, so she could look at him like he could look at her. 

She was so hot. So beautiful. He still couldn't quite believe that she was here and that she was fingering herself while looking at him. He wrapped a hand around his cock and even from this distance, he could see her pupils dilate. Her eyes followed his movements and it slowed down her own.

“So hot,” she murmured, even licking her lips. He looked down briefly and saw the same she was seeing, but he didn't really understand the appeal. However, she liked the view, so he kept it up, raising his own pleasure slowly. Her fingers sped up a bit and he imagined himself thrusting inside her, his fingers, his cock, his tongue. She threw her head back and he saw she came, her mouth opened, and my God it was so beautiful. It was one thing to have her orgasm underneath him, or while she was straddling his hips, because he would be inside her and would be slightly distracted by the contractions around his cock. But now, he was quite far away from her, the only connection between them their eyes, but now even those were turned away from him in her pleasure. She was so beautiful. He couldn't get over that fact. She really was. 

When she returned to earth she looked at him and was over it almost instantly. She was going to him and for a moment he wanted to stop her, he hadn't come yet, the fantasy wasn't really completed, but then she swung her hair to one side and his heart was basically exploding in his chest and before he knew it, she had her lips wrapped around his cock and was bobbing her head up and down. He nearly cried with happiness and pleasure and put his hand in her hair for a lack of a better position.

But it was too much. He loved the way she was teasing his tip with her tongue, loved how her fingers played with his balls, her free hand brushing his upper thigh. He didn't want to finish like this. He wanted to see her come again, with this orgasm that was building inside him detonating inside her. 

He put his hands underneath her arms and hoisted her up. She gave a small gasp of surprise but let him manhandle her. He guided her into his lap and she slid down onto his cock without much trouble. 

“God, Phil,” she breathed, her head thrown back again, and if it weren't for his hands supporting her back she would have simply fallen back. “You're so big.”

She always knew what to say but she didn't usually indulge in dirty talk. (She had always been way better non-verbally, as opposed to him.) He smiled, kissed her throat and elicited a moan. She rocked in his lap until she was close again, and he was trying his very best to hold out as long as possible. 

“Don't stop,” she breathed, her hands holding onto him tightly. He kissed her, leaned forward so she was on her back, her head laying off the edge of the bed. He was covering her completely, his lips on her throat, and he seemed to have found a good spot inside her because she was responding even more than she usually-

He could faintly hear Amelia crying in the distance, and a pang of disappointment shot through his body, but Melinda didn't seem to notice as she wrapped her arms tightly around him and came hard, her mouth open on a silent scream. Her legs shook, her pelvis too, and she was scratching his skin. She seemed shocked at her own orgasm but she kept shaking, within seconds more of her body joined and eventually she gave in, her hands in his neck pulling him closer. She wrapped her shaking legs around him.

He came with her. He couldn't help it. The sight of her like this was just so incredibly sexy there was no way he could have held out for longer. He came inside her and buried his face against her neck, panting.

He didn't hear Amelia anymore and it worried him, even through the euphoria his orgasm had given him, but still Melinda didn't notice. She was crying but smiling, too, her forehead covered in sweat, her hair damp and a mess. He pulled out and gathered her in his arms, placing her head on her pillow and tucking her in. It was still early. She could sleep a little more.

But he knew she was a massive cuddler after sex and she wouldn't let him go. She liked to make him believe that he was stronger but he knew she could overpower him with the greatest ease, so her hold on his wrist left no space for discussion. 

Then, he heard Amelia laugh and the sound came closer. A knock on the door followed. 

“Are you decent?” When he didn't respond, the door opened slowly and Daisy poked her head around the corner.

“I've got her,” she explained, and now Coulson knew why Amelia had been laughing so shortly after crying. (She absolutely adored her big sister.) Coulson was glad that he had covered Melinda and his own lower body with the covers. Daisy looked at them intently for a few moments. It was bound to be awkward for her. And Coulson felt guilty, he knew as parents his own emotions should be in the background. Yet they had Daisy, who much prefered to crash at their place than her own empty apartment, and she even accepted the discomfort it brought her sometimes. 

And Daisy didn't mind caring for her baby sister. In fact, she loved it.

“Is she okay?”

They both looked at Melinda, whose eyes were closed, face flushed, seemingly in a trance, far away from them. It must look a little odd, but Coulson quite liked the idea that he had been the reason for this.

“She will be. Just needs a minute.”

Daisy stepped out but Coulson stopped her. 

“Daisy?”

“Hmm?”

“Thanks.”

“No problem.”

“And Daisy?”

“Yes?”

"Sorry."

"For what?"

"For making things awkward."

She was quiet for a while. He really was sorry. He wished he could have created a better environment for Daisy to live in, better parents, more responsible, less sex-crazed. But... he loved Melinda, he was in love with her, and he liked to believe that they had a healthy sex-life. Daisy had seen their interactions in the first months after the birth, too. She had fled from the house multiple times because she was afraid she might get a full diaper thrown at her. 

Coulson realized that she hadn't acted like that in recent months. Sure, she often complained about how awkward it was to hear him and Melinda make love, and he fully believed that it was awkward. But she was still here. He wondered why.

Daisy shrugged. "You guys need anything?"

He needed a couple of seconds to switch, shocked and confused by her sudden change of topic.

“Can you put some hot water in the kettle? I'll be down in a minute.”

“Sure.” Amelia squealed for some reason, her head poking around the corner briefly. Coulson smiled and waved at his baby daughter.

"Hey baby girl."

Amy thrashed around with her arms happily, babbling in her own little language. Coulson's heart warmed.  Daisy left and Coulson turned back to his wife. She had her eyes closed, her face still slightly red, but she was smiling. She only just seemed to have returned to her senses and it made his heart soar a little - he had rocked her good.

“Wow.”

He kissed her and cuddled her close, giving in to the hormones that he knew had been triggered in her brain. Her arms wrapped around him too, and she put their foreheads together.

“That was something.”

He chuckled and brushed her damp hair out of her face. 

“I know I'm already big on the compliments but I've never…”

“You were shaking.”

She blushed and his heart swelled. She didn't blush often, he sometimes doubted her face could even do that. But then she proved him wrong in moments like these and it made him fall in love with her all over again. She was adorable. And once again, she would kill him if he ever called her that. Even after such an intense orgasm, fully naked, their two daughters downstairs, she would definitely kill him.

“It was really good.”

“I could tell.” He looked at her and brushed her cheek. “Did I touch a good spot?”

She nodded. He filed this information in his head. He would like to see such shaking again in the future.

"You never shook like that before. Were the previous months that bad?"

She rolled her eyes and brushed his upper arm at the same time. He got some conflicting messages like that. 

"This wasn't any better than the previous times. Just... different. I guess I was a little tense, and with your cock, like that... everything just let go." She looked him directly in the eye then. "Don't let your ego get too big just yet."

"Even though you never shook like that during sex?"

"Not with you."

He frowned. "With somebody else then?"

She was silent and he already knew the answer before she said it. She was an open book.

"No."

"So I made you shake during sex, possibly for the first time in your life, and yet I can't let it get to my head?" he said, feigning confusion. She knew him better than that.

She rolled her eyes and kissed him, ending the conversation there. He couldn't help but feel his heart swell, among other things.  He brushed her hip and cupped her butt. He didn't mean to heat things up but that was the way they were nowadays. She wasn't protesting. He loved that he could take these liberties, just grab her butt like that, kiss her deeply, make stupid sex puns that caused her to laugh. 

“It was even better than the dream,” she whispered, back to their previous topic. “We were only masturbating then. The blowjob was just improvising.”

He was glad she had given in to that whim. He could never get enough of her lips around his cock.

They snuggled a little longer until he heard the kettle whistle downstairs and disentangled himself from her arms. 

The current whistle pulled him out of his pleasant memories and he was reintroduced to the scene he was presently in. Daisy was annoyed at him for some reason, Melinda was just smiling behind her cup of Rooibos tea. 

“Honestly. You're like raunchy teenagers.”

He didn't even try to refute that. She was right. And he loved every single moment of it.

He adored this sexy little mom. He praised her creativity and her willingness to submit herself to him without losing her own dominance. He loved everything about her, body and soul, and he realized more than once that he had met his soulmate in his twenties without realizing it. He had made a life-long promise in meeting her to always take care of her, cherish her, his best friend, his lover, his wife and the mother of his child. 

Melinda smiled at him with Amelia in her arms and Daisy behind her half-heartedly complained about their sex life. (It must interest her in some way, otherwise she wouldn't have brought it up time and time again. Coulson knew she was a responsible adult, so Daisy had had sex herself, but just like any other father would, he refused to really think about the topic of his daughter 'getting it on'.) 

Melinda was the center of his attention, always had been. In the past three decades, every decision he had ever made had actually been connected to her in one way or another. She had been sent into the field, something required for Specialists, and he had voluntarily signed up, much to the confusion of his superiors. (Communications never went into the field.) He purposely had himself put on the same assignments as her just to tease her about her latest flirt, even though his heart had hurt for some unexplained reason. He would later learn he had already been in love with her then.

“He does this sometimes,” Melinda said, pulling him only partly out of his thoughts. “Sex improves his state of mind.”

“Do you never feel ashamed?”

“There's nothing to be ashamed of. Sex is natural.”

“Sure. But do you never get tired of it?”

“No. I could go all day if I didn't have other stuff to do.”

Daisy pulled a face and took a sip of her coffee. Melinda smiled and put a hand on Daisy's arm.

“I hope someday you may find love like this. I'm serious, Daisy. I know it makes you uncomfortable but Phil makes me feel so good. It's like… therapy. Or a really good workout. I can just relax and know that I'm safe with him and that he'll take care of me. With him, I don't feel the need to do anything. There's no program, no checklist. I just… let things happen. And he's never disappointed me. And he's definitely listening to us.”

Daisy whipped her head around, winced and grabbed her neck, probably pulling a muscle somewhere. Melinda just smiled and put a cup of steaming hot coffee on the table in front of him. She was perfect. She stood beside him and kissed his lips, and he wrapped an arm around her waist and squeezed her butt before letting her go.

“I'm happy for you both, though. I mean, it's awkward. And gross. And I would prefer not to hear any of it. But… I'm happy you're happy.”

Coulson smiled and raised his coffee. Melinda turned around and he got a good look of her butt.

Okay. For Daisy's sake, he should tone down the sex. She was telling them honestly that she would prefer to hear less of their lovemaking and she was also living under their roof. He should respect her wishes, too.

Daisy switched the subject and Coulson managed to keep his Melinda-hungry hands to himself. He made a silent vow to Daisy not to embarrass her further. Only a little bit, perhaps. Kissing was okay, right?

“But you can kiss,” Daisy said out of nowhere. “Without tongue, but kissing is fine. I don't mind seeing that.”

That opened some doors and Coulson smiled at Daisy. It would take some getting used to to live with this independent adult and also have his and Melinda's sex drives satisfied. But he would try.

“I'll babysit Amelia at my place more often so I don't have to hear you.”

That seemed good enough. In his head, he was already envisioning seducing Melinda, the two of them home alone. No one to interrupt them. He could finally make her scream.

He coughed, scooted his chair closer to the table and drank his coffee.


	6. Happy Anniversary

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for sticking around! For now, this is going to be the last chapter. I have run out of ideas, so I'm unable to continue the story. If you have any prompts, please feel free to drop them in a comment!

May lived for the afternoons where Daisy would take care of Amelia. Not because she wanted to be rid of Amelia, very much the opposite - Amelia was the best thing that had happened to her, completely unexpected but worth everything she'd had to endure in her life to deserve this.

May knew, however, that with Daisy and Amelia gone, she could get her way with Phil, more than just some quick, passionate sex before going to sleep. She didn't have to hold back. (Also, they had been married for one year today and Daisy insisted on taking Amelia for the day.)

She thought of her libido during her pregnancy and laughed sometimes. She had only wanted to do blowjobs at one point, and now she was hoisting herself in a sexy negligee she had bought about a week back. She knew she wouldn't be wearing it for long, but she couldn't wait to see his reaction.

She was a goddamn housewife, dressing up in sexy outfits for her husband. But she still remembered his attempts of seducing her the previous time Daisy had babysat Amelia. May had found him naked on their bed, obviously having waited for her to return from whatever it was that she had been doing. She felt herself getting wet with just the memory flashing through her head. She smiled and tied up her hair, scrutinizing her own look in front of the mirror. Not too bad. She could still see the swell of her belly where Amelia had been for so long, the stretch marks on her skin. She could also see the scars where she had fought death in her SHIELD career, bullet wounds mostly, some slashes from knives. Her skin wasn't perfect but it was more than enough for Phil. 

She heard the front door open and her heart fluttered. It could be Daisy, she reminded herself, and looked out of the bedroom window to check which car was parked on the driveway.

Yes! She ran out of the room but slowed herself down. Remember, Melinda May, calm and sexy. 

“Mel? What is this package?”

She rounded the corner and saw him look at the plastic the negligee had come in. She didn't say anything and just waited for him to look at her.

He did. And he drew in such a deep breath she thought he might faint. He dropped the package and stared at her, quiet for so long she was almost uncomfortable under it. Almost. She knew how incredibly wet she already was. 

He opened his mouth to say something but no sound came out. She just smirked, turned around and made her way over to the bedroom. She didn't hear any sound behind her, like he was frozen in place. No matter. She would just start without him.

She was about to crawl into bed when one of his arms wrapped around her and turned her towards him. Before she knew it, his lips were on hers and she was melting in his arms. He put his hand on her butt and pulled her close, his hard cock pressing against her stomach even through the fabric of his jeans.

He moved them the last inches to the bed and she fell onto her back. She saw he had already shrugged off his jacket on his way to the bedroom, shoes gone, and he was quickly getting rid of his clothes while she just looked at him with a smirk. 

She loved the idea that just the sight of her like this had turned him on so much he was already hard and losing his mind, tearing off buttons in his haste to get naked. She was toying with the ribbons that covered the end of the straps of the negligee. 

“You're just trying to kill me,” he groaned, finally pushing his underwear down and leaving him completely naked. She shrugged and smiled again. He leaned over her and kissed her deeply, until he was kneeling in between her legs and his cock was already brushing against her flesh.

She was also tempted to just start right here but she wanted to make him go crazy, with this negligee, which hadn't been cheap and honestly looked very good on her.

She wrapped her legs around him and turned them over, straightening the negligee so the edges kept tickling his naked skin.

“Mel…”

His hand brushed whatever he could reach and she straddled his hips. His finger slipped past the fabric and found her wet pussy - he smiled at what he found there.

“No panties.”

“Now you don't have to say cheesy things to get into them.”

He laughed and sat up despite her hands forcing him back down. He just hooked his fingers around her wrists and held them to the side. They kissed again until he spoke.

“I did some research.”

“In what?”

“Orgasms.”

She was shocked a little at this confession but not utterly surprised. He had proven himself to be extremely horny and he wanted to top some of the sexy dreams she'd had. And as a side effect, she now pictured him googling ‘orgasms’ and build a hard-on in his trousers. Maybe he had been fantasizing about her? About them playing out these new things? The thought made her hot.

God he was so sexy. She was wondering how he could think the opposite. He was her personal god, specially made for her pleasure. His arms, strong, she fit in there perfectly. His cock, which fit inside her perfectly, hitting all the right spots. His lips, which moved so gracefully against hers. They were perfect for each other. She had never been disappointed, never left hanging. He would make sure she was satisfied and smiling.

“You wanted a shaking orgasm again.”

“ _ You _ did.”

He shrugged. “Same difference.”

“Alright. So what did you have in store?”

He grinned and slipped out from underneath her. He walked out of the room briefly, staying away for a couple of minutes, before coming back. 

He opened a box and her heart stopped beating for a while as she looked at the contents. 

A vibrator. Long, bright pink, and he didn't even blush as he took it out and twirled it in his hands. She looked at his face and saw a cheeky grin there. 

They had gotten each other something for their anniversary without knowing about it.

“Happy anniversary,” he said, shrugging, that cheeky grin still in place. He was going to kill her some day. Her heart couldn't take this. 

They met in the middle of the bed and kissed, his hands slipping underneath the negligee to brush against her naked skin.

“Will you keep this on?” he asked, fingering the edges of it. She brushed her hands against his chest.

“If you want to.”

He nodded and kissed her again, and he pushed her onto her back again, spreading her out for him to look at her fully. He didn't even pause before kissing his way down her body and licked her pussy in one languid move and sending pleasure to every inch of her body. Her hand fell onto the top of his head instinctively and she bit her lower lip - then she realized they were home alone and she didn't have to be quiet. She let out a moan for good measure. 

His own moans vibrated against her flesh and she threw her head back. It felt so good. She loved it when he ate her out like this, he absolutely adored it and he let her know how much he loved it. A finger slipped inside her and his name fell from her lips, she couldn't help it.

“You're so tasty,” she heard him mutter and her heart soared high. She liked hearing dirty talk, just as he did. She would kiss him soon, tasting herself on his lips.

He was super skilled with his lips and fingers and he had her panting in minutes. He thrust a second finger inside her and she felt the fireworks approach in her lower belly, but then he pulled away entirely and she was only half contracting, entirely empty and bare now. He didn't seem fazed and just leaned up to kiss her deeply. At least she had that. 

He was out to tease her, she could tell. But he did sit back and looked her in the eye after he had pulled away from her.

“Do you trust me?”

“Of course.”

He nodded but the conversation hadn't ended yet, she could tell.

“I know we've never talked about sex toys… but… I thought you might like this.” He raised the vibrator again and she got a good look of it. Yep. Definitely pink. Slightly curled, and only a little bit smaller than he was, which was still big enough. “I mean, that time I saw you masturbate was so hot and I thought, maybe we could do it again but improved? I know, it's probably stupid, I can still return it.”

He was already putting it back in its box but she stopped him. Why was he so insecure about himself? Why did he still think that she was not satisfied enough? Why did he think he was not sexy? 

Was she not spurring him on enough? But she knew, she really was. She had never hidden her feelings for him when it came to sex, never lied to protect his ego or faked an orgasm to improve his orgasm. He must know that… right?

He had, quite literally, rocked her world, and she could never be satisfied with a different man anymore. If anything, he had ruined her for the future - she had experienced heaven with him and any other man would only be able to show her the staircase leading up to the pearly gates. 

She knew instantly that him buying her a sex toy wasn't because he felt something was missing. It wasn't even a toy for  _ him _ , really, not unless he was really into anal, and she knew he wasn't really. She knew he felt that this toy would only improve their sex life even more, even if she had thought it was virtually impossible. 

“We can try it.” It wouldn't be the same as his cock but she was certain it would bring her some sort of release.

She reached for the vibrator but he moved it away. “Can I…?”

He pushed her back onto her back and twiddled with the vibrator a little again. She wouldn't deny that she was slightly nervous for what was to come. He knew how to toy with her. She would most definitely love this - and do all sorts of embarrassing things to defuse the pleasure. 

He lowered himself to her pussy again and licked, just a few times, enough to get her attention back to the more important topic at hand. She heard a buzzing sound before she saw the vibrator and bit her lip as she saw Phil push himself back up again and slowly move the vibrator to her pussy.

This was ridiculous. She'd owned a vibrator before, many, even. She knew how they worked and how they could get her off quickly. There was no reason to be nervous about this. But it was different this time. No lover had ever taken such pleasure from seeing her masturbate, and certainly no lover had ever pleasured her with a vibrator. It was… really hot.

Instead of just pushing it in and getting her off, he teased her lower belly with the tip first. Every single vibration found its way to her core and she gasped. He moved it up to her nipples and she threw her head back - they were still so sensitive, Amy hadn't been nursed in weeks and she still maintained such good caution with her breasts. Not him, though. She loved it.

She could faintly see him through her own pleasure and could tell he was really enjoying this, which turned her on even more. The beginnings of an orgasm were already in her tiny toe and she couldn't really fight it, didn't really want to.

Everything was a great big blur while he teased so much of her body with the vibrator, until he lowered it down her belly and towards her vulva. She looked at him and bit her lower lip and it probably made something snap inside him.

And then, the vibrator was on her clit. And everything just exploded inside her, everything at once, she was in a rocket ship on her way to space and saw nothing but stars, and she remained there in that big beautiful vastness of space, everything peaceful and quiet and gorgeous, until she was gently put back down on earth, her surroundings returning. She was warm all over, relaxed, some of her nerves still tingling a little. She heard her own breathing first, laboured, shaking, and then she heard his from not that far away, equally as uneven as hers. She dared to open her eyes after a long time and found his eyes immediately. There was some wetness there that was as of yet unexplained, and a big grin was on his lips. Her eyes moved down and she saw he was only semi-hard now, her thighs, she noticed only now, wet - he had come. Just from the sight of her in pleasure. His seed was drying on her skin. A new rush of pleasure made its way to her core but she put it on a slow burner for the moment. 

“Oh my god,” she breathed, and he chuckled. “What happened?”

He leaned in and kissed her and she could tell he had been crying for some reason. 

“I just fell in love with you even more, is what happened.”

She smiled and wrapped an arm around his neck so he was on top of her again. His semi-erect cock, quickly growing in size again, lay against her leg. The vibrator was still buzzing, wherever it was, and it made her giggle but she swallowed it. 

She had never even made herself come like that with a vibrator. He was impossible. 

She saw it lay on the bed beside them and she grabbed it before he did and pushed him off. He was frowning at her, worrying a little perhaps. She was not going to let him lose her mind like that twice in a row. He liked to watch her masturbate? He could get just that.

She didn't adjust the vibrating level and slid it down her chest and belly - this wasn't any different than all those other times she had fucked herself with a vibrator, except someone was watching now and it multiplied her pleasure. She teased her clit with the tip, imagining his cock sliding up and down, and only the vibrations made the sensation slightly better. She saw him looking at her intently and she was so glad she had opened up about her dreams a few weeks ago. She loved his passion. She loved how he was open for literally anything. She loved how gentle he remained through it all.

She slid the vibrator in her pussy in one sure movement and heard him groan beside her. She gave herself a few thrusts and let the pleasure wash over her. His hand wrapped around his cock and she was fixated on that sight, like she so often was. She loved to see him touch himself. With a little bit of imagination, she could feel his cock thrusting inside her. If his cock had a vibrating option.

She giggled briefly at the thought and was totally caught off guard when she felt his hand move hers away, the one that was pushing the vibrator inside. And suddenly, the pleasure was tripled, his thrusts quick and then slow again and she moaned, groaned, why did it feel so much better when he was the one thrusting the vibrator inside her? She looked at him and he wasn't looking at the vibrator working its way inside her, but rather looking at her face. He was so sweet. His face showed her exactly how much he loved her.

She reached over and stroked his cock, while his hand thrust the vibrator inside her, slightly angled now, she could feel it hit her G-spot and let out a gasp at the contact.

“There?” he whispered, his breathing labored. She nodded and he thrust the vibrator in the same angle a couple of times. It didn't take very long to get them both over the edge, and her legs were shaking again and her head fell back and she felt his lips against her throat and they lay like that for a long time, the vibrator no longer buzzing but still inside her. 

“God.”

“Happy anniversary to you, too.”

He chuckled and they kissed again. He had removed the vibrator eventually and it left her a little bereft. He didn't remedy that and it was mostly okay. 

“What were you thinking when you bought this?” he asked her, toying with the ribbons on the negligee. She had sort of forgotten that she was still wearing it, her priorities elsewhere, but now she remembered and it made another smile spread on her lips. She was glad she had bought it. He seemed to like it. At the time, it had seemed ridiculous, overly expensive and mostly see-through, but she had gotten some flutters in her belly when she had put it on, knowing it would do at least  _ something _ to him.

“I could ask you the same about that pink monstrosity.”

He grinned and slipped his hand underneath the negligee, brushing the naked skin of her belly.

“I keep thinking we've reached the ceiling but you always make me think twice.”

She didn't even mind tending to his ego, if his ego brought her so much pleasure and happiness. 

Not just pleasure. He would be beside her in the morning to make sure he could kiss her, even if it meant running late for work. He would bring her breakfast on bed on their off days, make sure Amelia was fed and bathed while May took a nice long bath or caught up on her guilty pleasure TV shows. He was so good with both their children even though there was an age difference of nearly thirty years between the girls. He could make them both laugh with just one sentence and it proved how well he knew them and how loved he was by both. 

She had been scared, at first. Of course she was. She wasn't made to be a mom, even though he claimed she was. She wouldn't have been able to do it all without him, though. His smiles, kisses, hugs, morning cups of tea made everything worthwhile. 

“You up for the real thing?” he asked her, only a slight mocking sound in his voice. She always was. He didn't need to ask. But she liked that he did.

She guided him towards the headboard and he leaned against it, his arms open and inviting. She fell in love again with that beautiful smile of his, like she did every day.

“You're so beautiful,” he whispered. He finally pulled off the negligee, handling it with care, and she sighed in bliss when her naked skin touched his. She was reminded briefly of Amelia, laying on her father's chest on the day she was born, and honestly many days after that, too. His calm breathing would calm their baby girl down while May was otherwise occupied. She understood now, as she had so often before, why Amy loved this spot so much. 

She slid into his lap and they simply sat like that for a long time, it was enough, just skin against skin. They had already been satisfied, and they had forever, basically. 

But eventually, obviously, their touching and kissing got to them and they joined. They established a gentle, slow rhythm until she came, her head in the crook of his neck, and he came moments later.

She loved this idiot. She was incredibly blessed and grateful to be beside him every single day.

**Author's Note:**

> Please drop a line below! Comments are always appreciated!


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